LFP FFB

2010 Champion: Sean Gaskill

2011-02-06T20:45:00.000-08:00

Lady and gentlemen, the results are in, and your LFP FFB League Champion is none other than...

Show Me Your TD's

Sean Gaskill

Gaskill walked out of two drafts this year with every other owner dismissing his team as dead in the water, and in the regular season he put it all aside and scored consistently enough to make the playoffs and give himself a chance at a title. Then once he hit the playoffs, his widely criticized draft strategy went off to provide a 15 point lead going in to the Super Bowl. With touchdowns by Mendenhall, Wallace, and the Green Bay Defense, Gaskill took his first solo-ownership year and launched himself into the record books. A well fought season and postseason, rewarded with the ultimate prize to be presented at the owner's meeting, the league trophy.

Congratulations to Gaskill, and to everyone that made the playoffs and battled it out valiantly.

Final Standings:
Champion - Show Me Your TD's, Sean Gaskill
2nd - Angry Asians, Jason Wong
3rd - Hail to the Chefs, Tony Le
4th - Forsett Down Her Throat, Jared Underbrink

-Commish

Hypothetical Best Team of 2010

2011-01-06T16:13:00.000-08:00

With just the ability to know the future without anyone else having a clue, there is one team that could have drafted a team so incredible, so talented, that they might just have set some records this year... I'll leave all the math and match-up results to someone with more time and energy than I have, but without further ado, let's review who that potential Hall of Fame owner could have been...

That's right Kyle, you even had your first two picks right! ...and then failed to capitalize on what could've been the greatest team of the year.

Congrats buddy, you were the Hypothetical Best Team of 2010!

-Commish

Playoff Puzzle Solved

2011-01-02T23:03:00.000-08:00

West Division
Champion - Forsett Down Her Throat
Wild Card - Show Me Your TD's

East Division
Champion - Tony Le
Wild Card - Jason Wong

WARNING, FOUL LANGUAGE AND HOLIDAY SPOILERS AHEAD!!!
Fallout for Mike, left out on tie-breaker, as performed by members of FX series "The League"
Mike played by Kevin
Wong played by Ruxin
J-Jak played by Taco

I hate you all,
Mike

Playoff Lives on the Line

2010-12-29T13:24:00.000-08:00

Week 16 leaves one playoff spot up for grabs in the West division, with a whole lot of possible finishes and two different potential division champions. Out East Jared has clinched the division title and now the wildcard is locked up for Gaskill, despite a valiant late-season charge by J.J.'s squad. So without further ado, let's look at the possible outcomes in the league for every team, and over the next couple of days we will take some in-depth looks at the important match-ups for the last week of the season.

EAST

Division Champion: Forsett Down Her Throat

Wild Card: Show Me Your TD's

My Team Blows Again will take 3rd in the division with a win or a Pissing Excellence.

Pissing Excellence can take 3rd with a win and My Team Blows Again loss.

5th: Wacco For Flacco

WEST

Clinched Playoff Berth: Hail to the Chefs can clinch division championship with win, or Angry Asians & I Stiff Armed Your Mom win, or Angry Asians win, or I Stiff Armed Your Mom win.

Angry Asians can clinch wildcard with win and I Stiff Armed Your Mom loss. Eliminated with loss.

Mountlake Terrors can clinch division championship with win plus losses by Angry Asians and Hail to the Chefs, can clinch wildcard with win and Angry Asians loss. Eliminated with loss.

I Stiff Armed Your Mom can clinch wildcard with win. Eliminated with loss.

5th: Party Animals can eliminate Angry Asians with win.

Stay tuned tomorrow for the first set of game breakdowns.

-Commish

3-Steps to Greatness

2010-12-22T06:30:00.000-08:00

Over the past four years we have had four different champions, and with only one of those still in the running for the league title there is a very real chance we could see our fifth different winner. With this in mind as we are two weeks from deciding the field of four, the LFP FFB staff has dipped into the annals of our leagues brief history to develop a short set of guidelines for how to win a championship!

1. Farthest to fall...
Only once has the top seed in the league ever won the championship, Kyle in 2007. In his case the top seed was awarded to the team only on a tie-breaker, hardly a dominating season.

2. Winner, winner, you go hungry...
To add on to the top seed curse, no team has ever led the league in regular season wins alone and won the championship. To this point in league history the regular season winner, when not shared, has been cursed to two fourth place finishes in 2006 and 2009, and a devastating second place finish in 2008. So far anything over 11 wins is a ticket to Loserville.

3. Perfect Nine...
The past two years have seen three 9-8 teams make the playoffs, and both years one of those 9-8 teams won the championship. In the first two years of the league no 9-8 teams made the playoffs, which makes the 9-8ers two for two with a third place finish mixed in because there are only so many titles to go around.

Will history hold, or will fantasy football continue to be as unpredictable as ever? Only time will tell...

-Commish

Clinch!

2010-12-21T04:09:00.000-08:00

The results are in for the top spot out West, and Forsett Down Her Throat has clinched the division thanks to the tie-breaker over Gas. With one spot filled up, there are three playoff berths yet to be claimed and seven teams in the hunt. Let's take a brief look at the West Wild Card race...

Show Me Your TD's vs. Pissing Excellence
No bigger match-up in the league this week than this win-and-in for Gaskill. A TD's victory locks up the Wild Card in the West, but if J.J.'s squad doesn't Piss this one away they have a very real shot at a first playoff appearance. Pissing Excellence must win both remaining games against Gaskill and Jared, plus rely on Gaskill losing in Week 17 to Hail to the Chefs. Meanwhile Gas need only win one of his remaining two games to lock things down. This week will go a long way toward determining the second playoff spot out of the west, stay tuned!

Out in the wild wild East things look totally different, as all five teams are very realistically in the race. There are so many possible combinations that it can make your head spin, so instead of entertaining everything over a two-week stretch, we will look only at the possibilities to clinch playoff spots this week...

Mountlake Terrors
If the Terrors can buck Wong's late-charging Angry Asians in Week 16, they can lock up a playoff berth by virtue of tie-breakers over Hail to the Chefs and the Party Animals. In this case the Terrors can clinch the division with another win in Week 17.

Hail to the Chefs
With a win over the Stiffies and some help in the way of losses by the Mountlake Terrors and Party Animals, the Chefs can lock up a playoff berth, and control their own destiny for a division title.

As far as the other three teams go, I Stiff Armed Your Mom can't clinch anything, but will be alive in Week 17 regardless of a win or loss this week. The Party Animals can stay in contention with a win this week, and in that case would leap-frog the loser of the Chefs/Stiffies match-up in the division standings with some stipulations. Finally the Angry Asians can claim a tie-breaker over another top team in the division with a win, and vault themselves into the wild card slot with a do-or-die game in Week 17. No matter which way you slice it, every team here has a serious possibility, and that's what it's all about when it comes to crunch time.

Week 16 is almost upon us, and we will see the cream rise to the top soon enough. Which of the last seven teams will stake their claim to a playoff spot and a shot at the 2010 Championship?! Only two weeks to go...

-Commish

Week 14 Fallout - East Division

2010-12-15T06:30:00.000-08:00

East Division

Party Animals - Vicki Harris

The highest scoring team in the league, and Week 14 is mounting a comeback in the tight East Division race. A huge win over Craig this past week clinches the head-to-head tie-breaker and leads into another brutal division match-up with the tie-breaker at stake. Back-to-back wins with help from Wong or Jared could lead to a win-and-in game in Week 17. Exciting stuff from top-to-bottom in this division...

Angry Asians - Jason Wong

This team is electric, and if they can run the table the rest of the way and get some help, has a very real shot at the playoffs. Tie-breakers have been decided over Vick, but in the favor of Craig and Tony, with Mike still to be determined. Winning is the only option for this team.

I Stiff Armed Your Mom - Craig Peterson

With a big loss at the hands of the Party Animals in Week 14, this team slipped out of a playoff spot on tie-breakers, but is tied with the first and second place teams. Wong, Tony, and Mike in that order makes for a brutal, all-division schedule to wrap up the year for Craig's team, but they still control their own destiny.

Hail to the Chefs - Tony Le

Back-to-back losses see this team drop from the division lead to the wild card slot, plus a tie-break loss to the new division leader. With tie-breakers over Vick and Wong, Tony's squad is in a great position to get into the playoffs in the next couple weeks, but Week 15 will be as big as it gets against the dangerous Party Animals.

Mountlake Terrors - Mike Harris

This team snuck up on the division over the past three weeks. After a four game slide, the Terrors just clinched the tie-breaker over Tony, and have rough games against Jared, Wong, and Craig if they want to stay relevant in the playoff picture. One loss is all it takes to shake everything up in this division, stay tuned...

Week 15 starts tomorrow night, strap in and hold on tight!

Week 14 Fallout - West Division

2010-12-14T06:30:00.000-08:00

West Division

Wacco for Flacco - Kyle Stinson
How Wacco is Flacco coming up 1.15 points short of a win on Monday Night football? Game over for the Squad led by Adrian Peterson and Roddy White, who will have to battle it out with our next team to avoid last in the league...

My Team Blows Again - Jason Jakubiak
This team has fallen off the map, and losing Aaron Rodgers early on Sunday killed any hopes of grasping at playoff glory for a second straight year. Under 60 points for the week, and narrowly avoiding last place in the league for now.

Pissing Excellence - J.J. Didier
Well look who's making a late run, it's the Saints laden urination perfectionists. An extremely narrow win over a division rival clinched a three-game sweep against Kyle and puts this team just one game away from a playoff spot. With one game to go against Gas in Week 16, two more wins would put J.J. into the wild card slot, his only chance for a berth in the playoffs. This is the team to watch in the West as the season starts wrapping up.

Show Me Your TD's - Sean Gaskill
Three weeks, three losses, 222.4 points, and still in control of his own destiny for the wild card, or an outside shot at the division title. This team needs to figure things out in a hurry if they want to stay in the playoff picture, with a charging Pissing Excellence team only one game behind them and the division leader creeping away, Week 15 is as close to a must win game as you can get without all the marbles on the line.

Forsett Down Her Throat - Jared Underbrink
6-1 over their last seven games, this team is cruising to the West Division championship. One more loss by Gaskill and they clinch, plus two wins out of their last three will guarantee the #1 seed in the playoffs.

Week 14 fallout for the East Division, piping hot on Wednesday!

The Stretch Run

2010-12-07T00:13:00.000-08:00

Week 14 sees some of the biggest match-ups of the season to this point as far as playoff scenarios go. Sure, every week from here on will be enormous for a lot of teams, but playoff lives are literally at stake starting this coming week. Let's take a look at the schedule for this coming weekend...

My Team Blows Again vs. Angry Asians
These two 5-8 teams will battle it out in a bid to win out and make the playoffs in what would be incredible fashion. For the Asians, a loss by the Chefs and/or Stiffies can keep them alive even if they lose. The Blow-holes have to win to compliment a guaranteed TD's or Forsett loss just to keep them alive by a sliver. The loser of this game is nearly doomed at best.

Party Animals vs. I Stiff Armed Your Mom
The Animals control their own destiny this week, as a win here knocks down the #2 Stiffies and brings them within two games of a playoff birth with a little help. Either the Chefs or Terrors will lose, which helps both teams in one way or another as the Stiffies could move into first all alone with a win of their own.

Mountlake Terrors vs. Hail to the Chefs
These teams will decide the season series and the tie-breaker this week, and with a one-game lead in the East it is as big a week 14 game as we have on the schedule. The Terrors can move out of third place and directly into playoff contention with a win, whereas the Chefs can bury a close competitor down in the standings and keep their possession of the division lead. This is the game of the week in the East at least.

Pissing Excellence vs. Wacco For Flacco
Simply put, the Flacco's must win and count on a loss by the TD's to stay alive, or it's all over. The Pissers look to build on their momentum and will move one game closer to either Forsett or the TD's if they can win this one, but should they fall they will be hoping for a Forsett win to keep them just two games back of the wild card.

Show Me Your TD's vs. Forsett Down Her Throat
A battle of the top two in the West, where no matter what happens the standings will remain the same. However, should the TD's pull one out it will make it a tie-breaker lead for the Forsett's, putting the pressure on to win every week to maintain the spot atop the division. Forsett looks to bounce back from a miserable week and regain their stride in an important positioning match-up for the stretch run. Both teams will hope for a Pissers loss to increase their breathing room in the division.

Nothing like playoff implications to get everybody riled up in Week 14, good luck to most of you, and to the rest I hope you lose miserably.

-Commish

Week 12: LFP Pro Bowl Lineups

2010-11-23T04:40:00.000-08:00

Lady & Gentlemen, the lineups for this week's pro bowl match-up are as follows:

West Division
QB Philip Rivers GAS
RB1 Arian Foster GAS
RB2 Adrian Peterson KYL
WR1 Brandon Lloyd DID
WR2 Roddy White KYL
WR3 Greg Jennings UND
TE Marcedes Lewis UND
K Matt Bryant UND
DEF Green Bay Packers GAS

East Division
QB Peyton Manning MIK
RB1 Peyton Hillis TLE
RB2 Chris Johnson WON
WR1 Terrell Owens CRA
WR2 Dwayne Bowe VIC
WR3 Calvin Johnson VIC (Replaces Hakeem Nicks MIK)
TE Antonio Gates WON
K David Akers VIC
DEF Arizona Cardinals MIK

To the victor go the spoils, $5 in free agency up for the highest scoring team owner!

Good luck,
Commish

Un-be-lievable...

2010-11-16T01:01:00.000-08:00

Those of us who watched Monday Night Football were able to bear witness to not only an incredible performance by a single player, but a tight contest that seriously could have gone either way at any moment in a division match-up. Michael Vick dismantled Vick's Party Animals appropriately enough with a record-breaking performance where he not only scored a total of six touchdowns, but made sure only one went to Jeremy Maclin and no drives stalled for David Akers field goals. Round two between the Party Animals and the Angry Asians followed suit as to how their first meeting went, where the teams combined for a record-breaking total. This time they topped their own record, and for the second time the Party Animals happened to explode against an Angry Asian team that exploded just a little bit more. If it weren't for Dwayne Bowe being on the bench, this one would have gone the other way, but what a battle between the bottom two teams in the East division. If we take anything away from this, it has to be that both of these squads are awfully live dogs the rest of the way and should not be counted out. Were it not for injuries and unlucky schedules, there isn't much that would have prevented these teams from resting atop the tables.

Get ready for Week 11, we've got some of the best match-ups on paper all year. Also keep an eye on the league leaders, as Week 12 will be our second annual Pro Bowl, which will truly be a Thanksgiving special with all the trimmings!

-Commish

Breakdown: Best in the West

2010-11-09T00:50:00.000-08:00

181.3 points separate first and second place in the West Division after nine weeks of football. That amount of points seems almost insurmountable, conjuring images of a powerhouse running over everyone in their sights... Only in this case that number represents how many more points second place in the West has scored than the first place team. Forsett Down Her Throat has relied on what some may see as a considerable amount of luck to reach a 6-3 record, 5-2 in the division, and a first place slot with only seven weeks to go. In part one of this week's featured content, we analyze how this first place team found itself on top of the heap out West.

Week 1 vs. Show Me Your TD's
In what has ended up being the difference in the standings, Gas failed to understand the potential of some players, resulting in an embarrassing defeat that saw two players on the bench score more points together than his entire starting roster combined. Not to mention the neglect of finding an available Utility player, thus leaving his tenth slot open and accepting a zero. This loss in the division turns the TD's into the second place team, making Forsett the leader.
81.85 - 67.6

Week 2 vs. Pissing Excellence
A solid victory over a full squad this week, as the studly combination of Andre Johnson and LeSean McCoy posted 52.6. This was a good division win early in the season, that began the early season burial of a rival and boosted Jared's squad to a perfect start.
101.9 - 85.8

Week 3 vs. My Team Blows Again
The pre-blockbuster trade Blow-holes failed to score 100 points, but won in blowout fashion. Just over ten more points could have been gained with a maximized point-output roster for the Forsett's, but that still would have resulted in a nearly 30-point loss. Only one player, Favre at QB, in double-digits can't cut it in this league and clearly didn't this week.
59.05 - 98

Week 4 vs. Wacco For Flacco
A bye week battery this time, catching Kyle's squad without studs Adrian Peterson and Miles Austin. Even so, a huge week by the New England Defense, netting 24 points took this team to another division victory and a very strong 3-1 start.
99.25 - 71.95

Week 5 vs. I Stiff Armed Your Mom
A second strong week in a row went unrewarded as Jared's crew ran into a buzz-saw lead by Matt Forte. The benching of Michael Crabtree and Felix Jones, while not ill-advised in any sense, ended up being costly for the Forsett's, seeing the winning differential as a possibility in hindsight. A tough loss to a worthy opponent, but another good showing and still in great shape at 3-2
119.7 - 98.15

Week 6 vs. Show Me Your TD's
This one clinched the head-to-head tie-breaker for the Forsett's, and rang in at a third straight performance near 100 points by going over just enough for the victory. Utility uses for each team lead to a tight one, but Jared's phenomenal receiver output carried the day for a margin of victory just over six points. 4-2 atop the West Division.
106.45 - 100.25

Week 7 vs. Wacco For Flacco
Inconsistency struck again in Week 7 against a familiar foe. Kyle's squad went off with a full roster, and could have tallied an even bigger win if it weren't for Kenny Britt's 45.5 points being stuck on the bench. Regardless, this game was a blowout from end to end and dropped the Forsett's to 4-3 in brutal fashion.
145.5 - 77.5

Week 8 vs. Angry Asians
A great game to pay attention to against Wong came down to just a 3.45 point difference. Andre Johnson, Ryan Mathews, and Marcedes Lewis lead the Forsett's with strong play as the Asians tried to cope with the loss of Michael Vick unsuccessfully. Each team was able to play the "what-if" game as they saw strong production sitting on each bench. 5-3 the hard way, once again atop the division.
86.9 - 83.45

Week 9 vs. Pissing Excellence
Burial complete in the eyes of many. A roster maintenance blunder results in a win here as was documented in the league blog. The dropping of Derrick Mason in favor of Patrick Crayton may be the right play as we move forward in the season, but in this situation where the move did not afford the team a full roster of three wide receivers it cannot be ignored. It is easy to say in hindsight, but Derrick Mason in the WR3 slot alongside the new arrival Crayton would have resulted in a desperately needed victory for J.J. against the Utility-lead Forsett squad. A return to 100 points and another win to go to 6-3 atop the division and tied record-wise for the league lead.
101.7 - 95.45

We can see that this team has caught a few lucky breaks, with some breakout days sitting on the bench for other teams, as well as bye weeks playing a big role. However, this is by no means a bad team albeit inconsistent at times. The 2010 Forsett Down Her Throat squad is a great reminder that margin of victory does not count for everything, it's all about getting the "W".

Next time we will take a look at the leader in the East.

-Commish

A Quick Question: Week 9

2010-11-07T21:22:00.000-08:00

Hindsight is always 20/20, and humor is always at someone's expense, so without further ado I would like to introduce a new feature to the LFP FFB blog that I hope will become a weekly favorite...

And now, a quick question with Pissing Excellence team owner J.J. Didier.

LFP: J.J., do you regret deciding to drop a receiver in order to pick up a receiver which still left you without a third receiver active? I should mention that had you kept Mason and dropped someone like, oh say C.J. Spiller, you would have over ten points more and have Jeff Reed tomorrow night kicking for a win. Is that something you'd like to do over?

DID: Fuck you Mike.

LFP: So you stand by starting Brandon Lloyd on his bye week?

DID: Seriously, fuck you.

Thanks for stopping by!

-Commish

MH Rankings Week 9

2010-11-07T09:42:00.000-08:00

Here they are, a game day edition of the MH Rankings just in time to stir it up!

Breaking News: Randy Moss Released

2010-11-01T12:13:00.000-07:00

NFL Network has confirmed that Randy Moss has been released by the Vikings. Not only news in the NFL, but in fantasy leagues everywhere and J.J.'s roster especially. Moss will be on today's waiver wire for the NFL, giving teams a chance to claim him. Should he clear waivers he will be free to negotiate with any team he chooses as a free agent. Minnesota will pick up the tab for his contract either way, but he can make more money on top of it should he clear waivers.

J.J. saw Moss' production slip with the Vikings and a broken Favre, but this could be a boost to his value and statistical output if he lands in the right place and doesn't miss any time.

Should New England reacquire Moss I will officially say that there was some sort of cheating somewhere by the Patriots, and for the NFL to allow something like that I would argue that there was collusion.

-Commish

LFP FFB Blog: A Global Reach

2010-10-28T08:00:00.000-07:00

Pageviews by Countries

United States

3,025

Canada

Spain

Malaysia

Australia

United Kingdom

Venezuela

Finland

Israel

Mexico

Since the LFP FFB blog's inception on August 12th, 2009, I'm happy to see at least some people are reading the content that has been posted. This year I am making an even stronger effort to stay active in posting, whether it be league related or just having to do with football in general. As you can see by the above stats, the blog has been viewed wordwide, hitting double-digits in Canada and Spain, largely as a result of people associating this blog for one having to do with La Liga, but I'll take it. The Israel views I already know were my cousin, and I'm assuming someone was on vacation in Mexico at some point, but how about that reach on a global scale?!

In my continuing effort to produce content that you guys want to see and will keep coming back to read, I would love to hear some feedback in the comments section of this post. Let me know what you want to see, what you want to see less or more of, and any other general comments about the league. Don't hesitate, and if you still haven't signed up to post, just do it!

Thanks,

-Commish

MH Rankings - Week 8

2010-10-27T08:00:00.000-07:00

Big time movement in my rankings for this week. Let's dig in...

-The Terrors go Peyton-less and blow up the previous #1 Stiffies, calling a 2-week Harris sweep and fulfilling the promise. Best record, division record, points for, and points against... Enough said.

-Wacco for Flacco flexed some muscle this week, and showed the kind of domination that can win the West. This team has a lot of upside and just obliterated the division leader from Week 7.

-The TD's absolutely embarrassed the Asians by not playing a TE or Utility player... and still winning. This team remains a force to be reckoned with, but has to prove themselves in the coming weeks to keep their high ranking.

-The Stiffies got handled for the second straight week by a member of the Harris family, and unless they can right the ship might see their blistering start turn into a tortoise-like middle of the season.

-The Chefs put up a hell of a fight against a potent Pissing team this week. Had Romo not had his collarbone destroyed you have to imagine that it would've been one of the best comebacks of the year. As it stands, it's one more L and a drop in the rankings.

-The urination specialists have made major strides in the past few weeks, and if the Saints start to punch the ball into the end zone instead of just collecting yards they will be a formidable foe league-wide.

-Forsett's representatives are mirroring the actual Forsett with the arrival of Marshawn Lynch, high hopes are diminishing into the background. This team refuses to score points, and as the division starts getting better may have seen their luck run out. There is talent on the roster, but consistency has been lacking.

-The Asians had a horrible week and suffered a bad loss to an 8-man squad, but this team scores in bunches, and it is hard to believe they won't start winning games soon.

-The Party Animals have a bad bad hangover after watching Matt Ryan and Darren McFadden put up just over 70 points combined... on the bench. The potential is there, it's just a matter of putting the right pieces in the right spots at the right time, fantasy football in a nutshell.

-The Blow-holes actually submitted a roster and won a game with a 2-QB attack outside of the division, but I still can't bump them up until I see consistent effort from this team.

-Commish

Week 7 Wrap-Up: Bad Break City

2010-10-26T08:00:00.000-07:00

Every week seems to bring a bad break story, but no week has had more bad breaks in recent memory than the one that just transpired. Let's take a look at the match-ups.

Pissing Excellence def. Hail to the Chefs: 113.6 - 106.2
Tony's team roared on Monday Night Football in an attempt to overcome a huge lead by J.J.'s surging squad led by Drew Brees and Marques Colston, but bad break became literal as Tony Romo broke his collarbone. Assuming all performances remained equal for Dez Bryant and Jason Witten, the addition of Romo actually connecting on their touchdowns and two-point conversion would have put the Chefs over the top and on to a 5-2 record. Instead, the Excellence Pissers snatch a third straight win and are now within a game of first in the West.

Show Me Your TD's def. Angry Asians: 86.45 - 78.6
Wong looks down the list at an under performing squad and can't help but shake his head at the poor play of every starter but Roethlisberger, Boldin, and Gates. Gas had nobody to play at TE and wasn't willing to burn a Utility usage, thus taking a shot with an 8-man roster and coming out on top. A start for Carson Palmer or the $16 man Brandon Jackson would have won this game for Wong, but instead the breaks go for Gas in a close win to keep him tied atop the West while the Asians stay at the bottom out East.

My Team Blows Agains def. Party Animals: 112.7 - 91.45
My, my, my, this one has to sting for the Party Animals. Two active bench players score 70.05 points, while 10 starters only top that by 21.4. J-Jak reaps the reward for actually submitting a roster and avoiding his third strike, but this is a loss for Vick that she has to somehow shake off and not allow it to reverberate all season.

Wacco for Flacco def. Forsett Down Her Throat: 145.5 - 77.5
This was a game where the bad break went to the team that won by just under 70 points, as Kyle watched would-be record breaker Kenny Britt go absolutely nuts to the tune of 45.5 points on his bench. When Steve Smith goes for 3 and Miles Austin hits 3.8, it stings a little when you realize that you could have won by over 100 points. As for Jared, Andre Johnson can't come back soon enough as Kyle battled his way into the tie for first.

Mountlake Terrors def. I Stiff Armed Your Mom: 126.9 - 80.35
Frankly, the only bad break in this game was that the Terrors' players had good games and the Stiffies' did not.. Craig could have started his entire roster against Mike's only 10 active players and still lost, even without Peyton Manning and LaDainian Tomlinson. First in the East is Mike's alone, at least for a week.

Stay tuned for Week 8 MH Rankings coming at you tomorrow at 8:00am!

-Commish

Seahawks Love

2010-10-26T00:49:00.000-07:00

Final Scores - Early Edition

2010-10-25T21:16:00.000-07:00

Here are the *UNOFFICIAL* final scores according to Monday Night Football's preliminary totals!

Magical Comeback?

2010-10-21T11:44:00.000-07:00

Magic Wants the NFL Back in L.A.

Looks like Magic finally caught up on the most recent season of Entourage and wants to pick up where Ari left off. LFP FFB league officials were able to reach Magic earlier this morning, and when asked about how to make this happen he responded with "Well things have been in fairly good hands, I don't know Ari Gold personally, but it seems like he started things off on the right track before his meltdown. I'd like to help in any way I can." He had no comment on what it's like to have AIDS.

Seriously though, since the Rams, Lions, Chiefs, and even Buccaneers are showing signs of life after some dismal runs for each team, I don't think there's any team that will be relocating any time soon. Cleveland? Not on Mike Holmgren's watch. So now the question goes to expansion again, right in the midst of a potential 2011 lockout.

My thoughts are that this is inevitable. The NFL has proven by working toward an 18-game schedule that priority number one is making money, not that there was any question. Concussions and injuries demand a tough-sounding response from the league, but if they cared about their players they wouldn't add two games to the schedule and further push the physical limits of their athletes. A new team in the second largest market in America will not redefine the competitive landscape, or really be necessary for the league, but talk about income.

I don't want a large Favre
Speaking of a magic johnson, it seems that two things remain more important to the NFL than anything else, making money, and protecting Brett Favre. How do you think Tiger Woods feels about being blasted by everyone with a microphone, blog, or Twitter account, while Favre gets a free pass until we see more evidence than voicemails and pictures?

I find the love affair with Favre fairly disgusting, which isn't news to anyone that knows me. People give him a free pass for his drug addiction, and no one can explain to me why that is. People dismiss the whole dick picture issue now, saying "what do you expect?" or "athletes are athletes" for a good QB who's been able to do it longer than most, but the greatest golfer perhaps of all time ends up as a headline everywhere from CNN to Al Jazeera. I don't get it. Why is Brett Favre more special than other quarterbacks? He's certainly not as talented as a lot of them, and I've seen him throw more crunch time interceptions than anyone. It must be something that people have created in their minds that tells them "Brett Favre is great," I guess I just have to much sense telling me otherwise to buy in.

This brings an unguided rant to an end, watch your step on the way out. Don't forget to tip your servers.

Opinion: James Harrison is a Huge Bitch

2010-10-20T10:09:00.000-07:00

Steelers LB Harrison Mulling Retirement After 75k Fine for Hit

There are no new rules, yet he's not sure he can play football and be effective under the NFL rules... So basically because he got fined for giving two Browns receivers concussions, he doesn't think it's fair to him and he's going to take his ball and go home unless he can headhunt freely. Mike Tomlin has a chance to talk him out of retirement, but honestly I have never seen a linebacker be more of a whiny little bitch than this, especially when you just look at the hit he put on right above this text. There is no effort to not go helmet to helmet, why should you not get fined for that?

Fuck him.

MH Rankings - Week 7

2010-10-19T10:00:00.001-07:00

Another week in the books and another win for the bottom two teams in the standings. The top teams in the rankings all went down, the West Division leader earned some respect, and no division has a clearly dominant squad regardless of point output. Let's dig in...

-Stiffies and the TD's remain on top despite losses, as looking at the season points scored warrant continued respect.

-Chefs and Terrors swap places again to round out the top four, while neither had their best week.

-Forsett makes a big move after a hard fought, Utility battle for dominance in the West.

-Perturbed Pacificers are grumbling as the best of the 2-4 teams, but this team will rise as they will likely return to scoring points in bunches.

-Animals and Pissers swap spots as the wild ones go off to take out the #1 ranked team.

-My Team Blows Again, blows it, again. Non-submission of a roster, plus a bye week receiver and an inactive... Pathetic.

What say you?!

MH Rankings - Week 6

2010-10-12T08:00:00.000-07:00

MH Rankings will be my own weekly ranking system that should not discourage other league participants from creating their own rankings and posting on the blog. I'd love to see multiple rankings, and perhaps someone could create an index to analyze average rankings or such in the future. I'll leave that up to the rest of you and just post my rankings for your entertainment.

After five full weeks everyone finally has a win, as the bottom-feeders took out division rivals to notch victories. At the top of the list, Craig's Stiffies maintained their roll by dishing out a 21+ point thumping to fellow 16-1'er Jared and his Asphyxiators, Gas' Flashers came from behind in a thriller against J-Jak's squad, and the Terrors took down the Infuriated Far-Easterners led by Jason Wong.

-Mountlake swaps spots with Tony's Chefs who slipped badly against the previously winless Party Animals.

-J.J.'s crew finally pissed some excellence at a 130 point clip, lifting his improving team two slots to 8.

-J-Jak's Blow-holes drop to 10th after a horrible showing in which he may have lost A-Rodg for a week.

-The Animals stick at #9 after a sloppy win over Tony Le, but a win is a win and 9th is better than 10th.

Disagree with where these teams landed? Good! Let's hear some debate!

-Commish

Week 5 Power Rankings, Final

2010-10-10T09:47:00.000-07:00

Coming in at #2 - Show Me Your TD's

Arian nation rising, this team has started to put together the winning roster submissions with outstanding running back play from the likes of Mr. Foster and Frank Gore. Throw into the mix a quarterback in Philip Rivers who is second on the team in average scoring (to Arian Foster's 24.48) at 24.28 points per game, and Dallas Clark who essentially turns the TE position into another WR2, and you've got a lot of points coming in every week. With a Week 1 stinker and a 0.8 point loss two weeks later, this team has improved and looks like a real contender, especially in a low-scoring, weak division to this point. Don't be surprised to see more wins as this second year manager tries to break through to the playoffs for the first time.

At last... #1 - I Stiff Armed Your Mom

Everyone that wondered about the Rashard Mendenhall pick can put it to rest after four games, as he's the leader in arguably the deepest running back corps in our league. Ahmad Bradshaw was another pick in question on draft day, but he now outranks Matt Forte, and BenJarvus Green-Ellis to round out a great rotation at an extremely important position. Matt Schaub and Chad Henne provide a quarterback duo that can put up a lot of points any given week, and the trade to pick up Terrell Owens has proven useful after last week's explosive results. T.O. is by no means a must-have either, as Reggie Wayne and Steve Smith NYG are outstanding at wide receiver in the first place, but it's just more depth that has led this team to #1 in the division and overall standings, and #1 in this week's power rankings.

Good luck this week everyone,
-Commish

Week 5 Power Rankings, Part 4

2010-10-08T12:00:00.000-07:00

Coming in at #4 - Mountlake Terrors

The new name and soon headquarters has been a good charm for this team so far, but the question marks at running back continue from week to week. 5th overall Michael Turner is anything but consistent, undrafted free agent turned stud starter LaDainian Tomlinson supplanted third rounder Shonn Greene, and Michael Bush just came back to be a backup. The receiver corps is no powerhouse week in and week out, but Brandon Marshall will get his looks all year, Floyd will be forced into putting up stats with Vincent Jackson still holding out, and Hakeem Nicks has been a very pleasant surprise. The tight end duo is not scoring as highly as hoped for, but most aren't surprised with that fact. This may seem like a high ranking for a team that is 3-1 courtesy of facing both 0-4 teams back to back, but seven starters come in averaging within 0.4 points of double-digits or better than double-digit scoring every week... And well, it's me, and I love me some me.

Coming in at #3 - Hail to the Chefs

This squad ushered out the Aaron Rodgers era after just three weeks, and ushered in the MJD era with a bang in week 4. Steven Jackson and Legedu Naanee made room for Santana Moss and Rodger's replacement in Tony Romo, each of which took the week off more or less in Week 4. A resounding win last week caps a three week romp by this squad in which their lowest scoring output was 112.35. Improvement each week for this squad has been key to their success, and the early season quarterback tandem of Tony Romo and the unlikely star in Kyle Orton could see them in to a deep playoff run if all remains the same. They will face a tough division all season, so nothing is set in stone, but don't expect too much of a drop off in the coming weeks.

Top two tomorrow, stay tuned!

-Commish

Week 5 Power Rankings, Part 3

2010-10-07T13:13:00.000-07:00

Coming in at #6 - Wacco For Flacco

Nobody loves Adrian Peterson more than our #6, but even so the rest of the roster doesn't quite fill out with the same oomph. Jonathan Stewart is inherently inconsistent thus far, and plays for a horrible team which doesn't help matters much, not to mention his real and fantasy teammate Steve Smith and his current high ankle sprain issues. Miles Austin and Roddy White are strong performers no doubt, but when Flacco and McNabb aren't heaving it with regular success every week it makes things a little iffy. Injuries and inconsistencies seem to be running through the league and this team is not immune, but expect good things in the near future here as they will be creeping up the standings.

Coming in at #5 - Angry Asians

The Angry Asians have faced a tough schedule in reaching the 2-2 mark, and they have been putting up points fairly consistently through solid running backs, surprising success at quarterback, and especially tight end play. Michael Vick going down hurts this squad immensely, so it will be a big test to see if Big Ben returning is just in time, or just not enough to fill the gap. Studs Chris Johnson, Anquan Boldin, and Antonio Gates should continue producing on a regular basis, but without a bona fide signal caller it will be a question as to just how strong this team can be. Expect positive things, but a tough road in a tough division for this perennial contender.

See you tomorrow as we get serious in cracking the top half of the power rankings!

-Commish

Week 5 Power Rankings, Part 2

2010-10-06T11:36:00.000-07:00

Coming in at #8 - My Team Blows Again

Aaron Rodgers is a big addition to this 2-2 team, but at what cost? Maurice Jones Drew and Ryan Grant are gone, replaced by Steven Jackson and Mike Tolbert. Santana Moss for Legedu Naanee. All downgrades, making it more imperative for Rodgers to go nuts all season. An embarrassing Week 4 showing (without a utility thanks to not submitting a roster) does not bode well after the blockbuster trade, especially considering that this is another team that has yet to break 100 points in any game this season. Being in the weaker division through the first four games has helped so far, but there's no doubt that everyone will start scoring points sooner or later. The question is will this be one of those teams or will My Team Blows Again live up to their name instead of their legacy. Last year's playoff run is a distant memory now, but this should be a team that can scrape together eight or so wins against the competition in the west, which might be enough to get back to the promised land.

Coming in at #7 - Forsett Down Her Throat

This one might come as a shock based on the 3-1, West Division leading record, but this team has been anything but dominate in getting there. The only time their schedule yielded a team that scored close to 100 points, this squad got blown out by almost 39. The two 0-4 teams wish they had this early season schedule as #10 Pissing Excellence would be 2-2, and #9 Party Animals would be 3-1. Playing the game the other way, this team would have a 1-3 record in Pissing Excellence's shoes, and be 0-4 with a blowout of over 100 points in Week 3 if the Party Animals were to trade places. Can a division be won by scheduling and good fortune? We will see. The injury to Andre Johnson has been the worst case scenario for this team personnel-wise, and his status for Week 5 is still up in the air. The breaking news of Randy Moss being traded to Minnesota bodes well, as Brett Favre's value is boosted significantly, but when the third highest scoring average on your team is from your defense, there could be tough times ahead. This team could continue to win very easily given the division and potential of their players, but as we will see tomorrow the power may be starting to shift.

Come on back tomorrow for #6 and #5.

-Commish

Week 5 Power Rankings, Part 1

2010-10-05T11:46:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the first of a five part series for this week's power rankings. after a solid sample of four weeks we now have a better idea of who's who in this league, as well as who isn't who we thought they were, but we let them off the hook

Without further ado, let's start at the bottom and work our way up...

Coming in at #10 - Pissing Excellence

At 0-4 this team has yet to break 100 points so far this season, but made big strides toward that goal in Week 4 hitting with 96.1 (using a QB in the Utility slot). The hell of it was that he ran up against Gas's runaway train that laid 141.15. Relying heavily on last year's Super Bowl champions by taking Drew Brees, Marques Colston, and Pierre Thomas as prime time players has thus far backfired. Brees has been pedestrian, Colston has been off the radar, and now Pierre Thomas is on the shelf possibly for another week with an ankle injury. Combine that with an unlikely shutout in Week 4 by Randy Moss, and things look awfully bleak for this group. There is a lot of room for improvement, and it is this Commissioner's opinion that players like Moss, Brees, Thomas (when healthy), and Vernon Davis will come on and lead this team to some wins in the near future. As for the start though, I might blame this one on the Madden curse simply because fans voted Brees on to the cover, and now they are the ones to be punished.

Coming in at #9 - Party Animals

The second 0-4 team in the league had their worst performance of the young season in Week 4, largely thanks to injuries and underperformers. First rounder Ray Rice is racked up on IR, Beanie Wells returned from injury, Darren McFadden went down with injury, Jahvid Best was questionable with injury, and Thomas Jones had a bye week... So much for running backs. Calvin Johnson finally came out of his cave and had a good day, but Austin Collie and Jeremy Maclin apparently went in to said cave for a week off. Tight ends have been disappointing, and the Baltimore defense hasn't exactly lit up the scoreboard. At QB, Tom Brady had a night off courtesy of Patrick Chung and the New England defense and special teams units. This team has dealt with these kinds of let downs on a weekly basis, all while facing the most points by any team in the league, 508.65. There are two teams (who will remain anonymous, for now) out there who have schedules that would have these 0-4 Party Animals sitting at 3-1 heading into Week 5, but no such luck. Expect changes in personnel, expect bye weeks to make it a little tougher before it gets any easier, but expect some wins from this team in the near future.

Tune in tomorrow when we will take a look at #8 and #7 in part two of this week's power rankings...

-Commish

Week 4, Ignition!

2010-10-03T02:17:00.000-07:00

Quick rundown on the recent blockbuster trade:
-Trade committee came back 2-1 in favor of passing after a last minute reversal of one vote.
-Reversed vote noted that balance seemed to be tipped to favor of Hail to the Chefs.
-With 1 TC vote and 2 league votes, review fell short by 1 vote.
-One of league votes noted balance seemed tipped to My Team Blows Again.
-All things considered, and votes compared, the trade appeared even and thus passed.

Week four is up and ready to go on the website, look for official rosters on team pages and the scoreboard just after 9:30am!

Blockbuster Trade Pending

2010-09-28T00:54:00.000-07:00

The #3, #9 and #11 picks in the draft might be waiving to one another as they swap sides if LFP FFB's first real blockbuster trade holds up through the trade committee this week. In the proposed trade, Tony Le would send Hail to the Chefs franchise quarterback Aaron Rodgers, first round running back Steven Jackson, and late-round wide receiver Legedu Naanee to Jason Jakubiak's My Team Blows Again squad in exchange for third overall running back Maurice Jones-Drew, third round quarterback Tony Romo, and sixth round receiver Santana Moss.

The Loss of Ryan Grant for Jason's team has left a hole in his scoring production that he hopes to fill by adding a top three quarterback, whereas Tony Le hopes to seize the opportunity to grab a consistently productive replacement at quarterback, while upgrading at running back and wide receiver. On the surface this trade looks fairly solid, but as with any big trade there are certainly some potential stumbling blocks.

Steven Jackson walked out of Sunday's action with an uncertain immediate future on account of his groin injury, which could hold this trade up. Tony Le's stable of running backs have been productive, but since Jason lost Ryan Grant there have been question marks. Adding this recently injured running back could prove costly if it ends up being more serious than currently expected, but after the slow start from Jones-Drew, Jakubiak might look forward to a bigger, punishing back to represent his team.

Regret may fill the air sooner than later for either side of this trade, should it pass the committee's judgment. Stay tuned to LFPFantasy.com for the latest updates.

-Commish

PANIC!!!!! Week 3

2010-09-24T10:13:00.000-07:00

What would a new feature be without a two day delay?

Without further ado, welcome to PANIC!!!!! What follows is serious information on which teams are doomed, and which teamed are only partially doomed. Facetiously of course, except when it's true.

After two weeks we have two undefeated teams, and two winless teams, and Darwin is grinning somewhere with the thinning of the herd. I would contend however that two weeks doesn't shape an entire season here in LFP FFB, simply because we have the entire 17-week season for those teams to rebound. So, without further ado, let's get into the panic!

Party Animals
This team has put up the least amount of points in the league to this point, albeit by a narrow margin, but has also faced the most points by a team this season. Beyond the scoring discrepancy the team has seen disappointing performances by franchise player Ray Rice, as well as all-American boy Tom Brady, plus small totals from the wide receiver and tight end positions. All taken into account, this team is on the brink, but I don't think it's time to lose it just yet.
Status: Ready the panic button.

Pissing Excellence

This team finds itself 0-2 with the third worst point total and third highest point total against, a tough spot to find oneself in. Many would be tempted to point the finger at a heavy reliance on star players from one NFL team, but looking up and down the roster I find it is another problem altogether, players not performing. To this point in the season, there are no dominate players on this roster, and the running back and wide receiver stables are producing mediocrity week in and week out. Certainly the potential is there in the likes of Drew Brees and Randy Moss, plus a consistent output from Visanthe Shiancoe, but with depth like Massaquoi and Spiller, this team could be in trouble.

Status: Begin applying pressure to that big red button.

Arms Race

2010-09-21T08:00:00.000-07:00

Week 2 is in the books and the trend of big days continues. Matt Schaub sliced and diced the competition to the tune of 497 yards plus an assortment of touchdowns, and the performances of DeSean Jackson, Andre Johnson, and LeSean McCoy powered high-octane wins heading into the third week of the season.

Atop the league in each division currently sit the two teams who have experienced the regular season success of 16-1 finishes, Craig and Jared, only to flare out in the playoffs. Each team feels a calling to return to greatness and prove themselves, and should make for a great dynamic to watch over the course of the season.

As for the rest of the league, we will take a look at the potential panic situations in a new feature starting tomorrow (Wednesday), so keep your eyes right here for new content all week long.

-Commish

Week 2, get it on!

2010-09-19T09:31:00.000-07:00

Here we go!

Rosters are in, rosters are up. Week 1 panic mode can be confirmed or put to bed today, and we'll get a little closer to seeing who's who in the league. Great matchups in and out of the divisions today should make this a week to remember, and don't miss the all-Asian extravaganza in Tony Le's Hail to the Chefs squad against Jason Wong's Angry Asians. Let's take a look at what the experts are expecting out of this division/continental rivalry...

-Commish

Week 1: Power Rankings

2010-09-14T12:53:00.001-07:00

This week's power rankings:

1) Angry Asians (1-0): Jason was the last owner to draft a quarterback, yet saw the third best production at the position. Chris Johnson looks well on pace to dominate again....East division be ready.

2) My Team Blows Again (1-0): Despite losing a Utility player early to a concussion, Jason recieved balanced scoring from the rest of his team, highlighted by a big day from Chad Ochocinco.

3) Mountlake Terrors (1-0): Great days by Manning and Nicks led Mike to a blowout victory over the defending champion. Poor play from the running back position already has Mike looking for 2005 All Pros in free agency. Expect bigger things from his other wide recievers in future weeks.

4) I Stiff Armed Your Mom (1-0): Got almost 50 points of production from the running back position, far more than anyone else. Had to be a bit scared for Monday Night Football when the Steve Smith scores were corrected, but held on for a tough win.

5) Wacco for Flacco (0-1): Posted the week's fourth highest score, but ran into a buzzsaw, not to mention the frustration of having his quarterback throwing primarily to his opponent's wide reciever.

6) Forsett Down Her Throat (1-0): The least impressive win of the week. With two sporadic (read: crappy) quarterbacks capable of unpredictable ups and downs, Jared will surely pick the wrong one every week.

7) Pissing Excellence (0-1): After an impressive Thursday night showing, JJs team couldnt get any real production out of other skill positions.

8) Party Animals (0-1): Vicki's MNF players, including first round pick Ray Rice, were hopelessly stagnant costing her a chance at winning this week. While the Ravens defense recieved a yardage bonus, Bowe and Kaeding provided virtually no assisstance.

9) Hail to the Chefs (0-1): Last years defending champion took a real pummeling at the hands of the leauge commissioner. That said, Tony saw several bench players get good production and will have some interesting decisions to make.

10) Show Me Your TD's (0-1): More like Frank Bore (/ba dum chhhh). This is out of principle, since not submitting a roster led to Nick and Gas coming up with the week's low score. To an even better extent than Tony, this team saw some impressive players emerge from the bench. WHICH RUNNING BACKS WILL PLAY NEXT WEEK THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME!

Studs & Duds

2010-09-14T10:00:00.000-07:00

Week 1 is officially in the books and the entire website is all updated and ready for your perusal.

For many of us it was a strange week in the fantasy world, specifically the way points were spread around throughout the league. A lot of sub-par performances from big names, mixed with big time performances from players in all different tiers. Highlighted by Peyton Manning, Arian Foster, Matt Forte, Hakeem Nicks and Chad Ochocinco, the week saw wins predicated on starting the right guy, versus the typical team-wide consistency that is often the norm. Sunday night and Monday night games yielded little offensive firepower, and it seems that the defenses were one step ahead in the spotlight games to start the season. Will the trend continue? We will find out in just five short days.

Most Dominate Performance in Week 1:

Angry Asians, Jason Wong

Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda Award for Week 1:

Show Me Your TD's

Runner-up: Hail to the Chefs, Tony Le

Get ready for Week 2, free agency is open now.

-Commish

Arian't you going to try?!

2010-09-13T08:00:00.000-07:00

Week 1 has two Monday Night Football games to cap the excitement, but what a first Sunday it was in LFP FFB!

This week we saw arguably the worst looking management of a fantasy football team that we have seen in this league, maybe ever.

After Sunday was through, Show Me Your TD's bench looked something like this:

BENCH Jay Cutler 31.8
BENCH Arian Foster 46.8
BENCH Tim Hightower 13.4

Wow, nice scores for backups! Except wait, what did the starters do?

Frank Gore 8.3
DeAngelo Williams 6.2

Oh, that's gotta hurt, especially when just playing Arian Foster would have put a victory within grasp pending Philip Rivers and Braylon Edwards merely having a pulse for Monday night. And to add insult to injury, that Utility slot is empty, yikes. These are the kinds of things we might expect from a rookie in the league, but after a full season it looks pretty bad.

To be fair, I don't think many would have thought to start Arian Foster over Gore or Williams, but it is indeed fun to point out the pain that Mr. Gaskill is surely feeling tonight.

Nick Perrault was unavailable for comment.

Scores are updated and official as presented on NFL.com Gamelogs. Please submit any score inaccuracies.

-Commish

Meet the Franchise: Pissing Excellence First Round

2010-09-12T12:00:00.000-07:00

Picking tenth is as good as picking first, except as bad as picking tenth. J.J. made a solid decision after watching the top nine running backs and top wide receiver go before he got a chance to pick, taking last year's Super Bowl MVP and stat machine Drew Brees. Frankly I don't have much to say about Brees because (unlike Steven Jackson) I respect the hell out of him. I will say he dresses fairly metro sometimes though, for example.

I believe everyone in Oprah's Audience got a brand new natural disaster preparedness pamphlet that day.

I hope you have enjoyed the ride through the first round picks, and I look forward to more and more content over the course of the season this year! Have a great season everyone, let's watch some football!

-Commish

Meet the Franchise: Hail to the Chefs First Round

2010-09-11T22:09:00.000-07:00

Picking ninth is all about finding the best of what's left, and based on my personal feelings for the player taken at ninth overall, I have to say Tony failed miserably. Not to say that Steven Jackson isn't an elite running back and a hell of a football player, but the guy's a bitch, and a Ram, and a bitch because he's a Ram. So since I hate the Rams so much I figured I would let my feelings be known and show you what it feels like to me to talk about Steven Jackson. Let's get an introduction to Steve...

Boo!

Just a Friendly Reminder...

2010-09-11T15:13:00.001-07:00

Weekly picks against the spread and Suicide picks can be made on the LFP FFB forum. Join in for what should be a transplendent time.

Meet the Franchise: Show Me Your TD's First Round

2010-09-10T12:29:00.000-07:00

Eighth is a rough place to draft, as a lot of the so-called "first-round" talent is gone by this point, but you are still on the hook to land your franchise player. Gas is taking the reigns this year for the first time, shedding the man behind the scenes and implementing his own strategy from the get go, a bold move to be sure. Some may have seen it as a surprise for the TD's to land a back like Gore, but surely this was all part of the plan. As a second year manager in their first year making GM decisions, we thought we would seek some advice for the Gas-man from the new face of the franchise.

Articulate and meaningful.

-Commish

Meet the Franchise: I Stiff Armed Your Mom 1st Round

2010-09-09T10:00:00.000-07:00

Motivation will not be a problem for Craig Peterson this season, as he struggled yet again in 2009, but this time saw his record 16-1 finish in 2006 tied. At seventh overall the Stiffies reached out and grabbed Rashard Mendenhall to save themselves some money later in the season pending a replay of last year. A surprise pick to some, but a confident pick by Craig as he got a runner he is comfortable mortgaging his house for. With Roethlisberger suspended, there are questions abound for the entire Steelers offense, but let's meet the key for their rushing attack as he apparently gets loose for a turkey bowl game with Craig.

Nothing like hearing your franchise running back talk up the RBBC (Running Back By Committee) strategy, but at least he's one of the apparent few that isn't spending all of his time playing Madden.

-Commish

Meet the Franchise: Forsett Down Her Throat 1st Round

2010-09-08T13:06:00.000-07:00

Starting the last half of the first round is always a tough proposition, as the four horsemen are gone, and allegedly another top player is gone. Going outside the norm though, Jared's 6th overall pick landed him arguably the most dominant receiver from a year ago in Andre Johnson. The man was labeled irreplaceable by ESPN, which makes it all the more reasonable that Underbrink's squad invited him back for a second season in a row. Since wide receivers are the divas of the football world, what better way to get a re-introduction to Mr. Johnson than joining him on a photo shoot?

How extremely manly. Here's hoping the first receiver taken this year fairs a little better than the other Johnson boy from last year.

-Commish

Meet the Franchise: Mountlake Terrors 1st Round

2010-09-07T12:00:00.000-07:00

The four horsemen have all gone and it was from picks five to ten where the first round of the 2010 draft would shape up to be interesting. At fifth overall the newly relocated Mountlake Terrors selected Michael Turner, a not-so-obvious pick at this point in the draft. GM Mike Harris selected the articulate, well spoken Turner to lead his charge for a playoff push in 2010 after a disappointing finish last season which ended his franchise's tenure in Lake Forest Park. Let's see if "The Burner" has been getting drunk and eating too much in the pre-season.

Not much ripe for parody in that video, so here's what the Terrors hope to get out of their franchise player.

Harris loves a Madden player on his side who won't stop trash-talking, these two will work well together.

-Commish

Meet the Franchise: My Team Blows Again 1st Round

2010-09-06T14:06:00.000-07:00

Round 1, Pick 4, Maurice Jones-Drew, the pocket Hercules joins last year's runners-up My Team Blows Again. J-Jak's team is switching to the powerful West Division, but he is packing a stick of dynamite in his attempt to return to the playoffs. MJD was projected third in the draft by a lot of people, but slipped one slot down and Jakubiak couldn't be happier to have him. The big question around camp however has been Jones-Drew's dedication to the game he is making a career in...

Not much else to say, it's clear that MJD's going to doom his team to a losing season while sitting on the couch eating and playing video games with his owner.

-Commish

Meet the Franchise: Party Animals 1st Round

2010-09-05T15:36:00.000-07:00

Installment number three brings us to the home city of Lake Forest Park and a team that looks for its first ever playoff berth after just under two seasons of management. Vicki Harris selected Ray Rice at number three overall, counting on his rushing and receiving prowess to take her Party Animals to the promised land in 2010. Knowing the weight on his shoulders, Ray-Ray has hit the gym hard this season to live up to Mama Harris' demands, so let's take a look.

I'm not sure why these all feel so racist, but here's to more fried chicken!

-Commish

Up Next:
Maurice Jones-Drew - My Team Blows Again, Jason Jakubiak

Meet the Franchise: Wacco for Flacco 1st Round

2010-09-04T13:00:00.000-07:00

In part two of the series we are introduced to last year's consensus number one pick, and a player returning to his old team.

Adrian Peterson sliding to the second overall pick was expected by most, but "All Day" will have something to prove for Kyle Stinson's team this year. A one-time member of the Barack Obomanu's in 2008, A.P. comes back as the second overall pick to Kyle Stinson for the second time in his career, but the two have yet to win a championship together. Let's take an inside look at Adrian Peterson's engine as we rediscover the "Diesel"...

Truly inspiring stuff as we head into another season of breaking wills. The last word goes to Kyle Stinson, owner of Wacco for Flacco and Adrian Peterson in 2010, "What really attracts me to A.P. is his willingness to do manual labor in chains, and this video certainly played a big role in selecting him at the number two spot."

Meet the Franchise: Angry Asians 1st Round

2010-09-03T13:31:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the first installment of "Meet the Franchise", a ten part series of the first round draft picks for 2010.

#1 overall draft pick Chris Johnson joins the rebuilding Angry Asian squad after their first ever year not making the playoffs. C.J.'s credentials from last year speak for themselves, and Wong hopes for an encore performance to take his team back to the playoffs for another shot at winning his first title. Without further ado, let's see if we can't pinpoint the qualities that make Chris Johnson the most dominant player in fantasy sports.

Faith Hill really spelled it out for you, he's fast and has gold teeth, plus he let us know that Wendy's 10-piece nuggets are the fuel necessary to fuck shit up in the NFL. Hopefully he doesn't forget to have fun, because even women wish they could play in the NFL, but they never, ever, ever, will.

Thanks to LFP FFB field reporter Faith Hill and #1 pick Chris Johnson for giving us a peak at race relations in Nashville.

-Commish

Next Up:
Adrian Peterson - Wacco for Flacco, Kyle Stinson

Draft Day

2010-09-02T17:24:00.000-07:00

Welcome to LFP FFB 2010!

The draft today officially kicks off the long-anticipated fifth season of LFP FFB, where every pick will determine whether you see your dreams realized in February with a championship, or if you will be crushed by the agony of defeat. To all the returning managers I wish you the best of luck, except when you play me.

-Commish

Owner's Meeting & Draft Lottery Notes

2010-08-26T01:37:00.001-07:00

Thank you to those of you who were able to make it to the owner's meeting this evening, I certainly enjoyed myself and I hope all of you did as well. For those unable to make it, things worked to your advantage, despite our efforts... Following are the notes from the meeting, as well as the draft order for the 2010 draft. Enjoy...

-Division realignment decided on by a vote of 4-1 for Yes, with one abstaining and the Commissioner not voting.

-Divisional realignment criteria determined to be based on the draft order drawing, evens to the West, odds to the East division.

-Post free-agency bidding waiver prices established. Under this new rule, should any team owner find themselves with an empty roster position as a result of lost auctions or otherwise, after free agency bidding has ended, they will have the opportunity to fill their roster spot by purchasing a free agent. This purchase must take place before roster submissions are due for the week, and cannot take place until 5:30pm on Saturday or after the last free agency auction has ended, whichever is later. This is strictly a last chance opportunity for rosters not being filled through unsuccessful free agent and contingency bids. The prices are $5 for QB/RB/WR, and $3 for TE/K/DEF from the remaining free agent pool.

-Meachem Rule: In the case of a double-turnover play similar to last year's involving Robert Meachem, the offensive player's touchdown will count, as well as the initial takeaway by the defensive unit, and any offensive statistics up until and resulting from the initial turnover.

-2-Point Conversions: If a player on your team is a part of a successful two point conversion try, you must it to the league commissioner by the final whistle of Monday Night Football for the week. QB passing 2PC's will count for 1 point, and any Rushing or Receiving 2PC's by any player will count as 2 points. If a conversion is not reported for the week by the last whistle of Monday Night Football by any party, it will go unrewarded for all involved.

-Playoff keepers will now be unlimited, allowing teams with more than six players remaining eligible from their regular season rosters to keep as many as they like, or all of them.

-The supplemental playoff draft order will be determined by the top three playoff teams choosing their draft spot, starting with the #1 seed, then #2 seed from the remaining slots, then #3 seed, and the #4 seed will take the last remaining slot.

-Craig offers $1 million to the winner of the league if he wins with his own PowerBall ticket.

-League owners are asked to bring $5 to the draft to go into the PowerBall ticket pool for league prizes. This additional money will then be used to purchase PowerBall tickets on behalf of the entire league either all at once, or spread out over the season (to be determined on draft day). Should one of the league tickets win, the winnings will then be split up between the 10 owners, with a set percentage going to each regular season finished from 5th-10th place, and different percentages going to 1st-4th place playoff finishes.

Draft Order for LFP FFB 2010 Draft:

10. J.J.

9. Tony

8. Gas

7. Craig

6. Jared

5. Mike

4. J-Jak

3. Vicki

2. Kyle

1. Wong

Divisions:

West - J.J., Gas, Jared, J-Jak, Kyle

East - Tony, Craig, Mike, Vicki, Wong

Schedule to be released on main LFPFantasy.com web page some time today.

Thank you and good luck to all,

Commish

Football Movie Marathon #16: Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994)

2009-12-31T10:49:00.000-08:00

The last movie of the year is Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994).

The story is fairly simple. Leading up to the Superbowl, Dolphins quarterback Dan Marino and team mascot, the field goal kicking dolphin "Snowflake" are kidnapped. While the police search for the superstar, Ace Ventura (played by Jim Carrey in a breakout role) is hired to find the dolphin. Ventura is an interesting character indeed. For the majority of the film he straddles the fine line between appearing mentally challenged and the most brilliant detective in the world. Along for the ride are Courtney Cox (Friends) as the love interest and Sean Young (Blade Runner) as the boss of the police department who just doesn't seem to sit quite right.

Watching this as a young lad, the hilarious portions of the film were mainly the slapstick and flat out craziness. Now there are couple more things that made me laugh, most notably when Ace recognizes that the Miami Dolphins team photo he has based his investigation on is not the most current when he notices one different player on a poster on the other side of a room. "Who...in THE HELL is.....this???" Also interesting is the fact that after realizing he kissed a man, he needs to eat a whole tube of toothpaste, go to town on his face with a toilet plunger, repeatadly drown his head in a toilet, burn his clothes, and take a shower while crying. Doubt that would fly in a movie 15 years later.

Overall the movie is a stupid yet fun filled romp that I find throughly enjoyable.

That's the movie marathon for this year. If I do it again next year we got several favorites including Jerry Maguire, Remember the Titans, Friday Night Lights, and of course, Air Bud: Golden Retreiver to go. Hope the two of you reading this had a good time and maybe watched a movie or two for the first time because of it.

Football Movie Marathon Rankings
1) Any Given Sunday (1999)
2) Brian's Song (1971)
3) Rudy (1993)
4) Knute Rockne: All American (1940)
5) Varsity Blues (1999)
6) The Longest Yard (1974)
7) Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994)
8) Small Potatoes: Who Killed the USFL? (2009)
9) Horse Feathers (1932)
10) Gridiron Gang (2006)
11) The Waterboy (1998)
12) The Band That Wouldn't Die (2009)
13) Invincible (2006)
14) Little Giants (1994)
15) The Longest Yard (2005)
16) Two For the Money (2005)

And here we go...

2009-12-29T02:20:00.000-08:00

Week 17 lady and gentlemen, and by some miracle of scheduling all six teams vying for three playoff spots will be tangled up with one another on the road to the championship. Big wins in Week 16 for the LFP Phreaks and Hail to the Chefs keep it all interesting and down to the wire like any good playoff race should be. Here's a quick breakdown of what needs to happen in each division for each team to make the playoffs, starting with the folks out West:

Breaston My Face:
Clinched Division Title

Lynnhood Curbstompers:
Clinch West Division Wild Card with win and Fister? I hardly know her. loss.

LFP Phreaks:
Clinch West Division Wild Card with win.

Fister? I hardly know her.:
Clinch West Division Wild Card with win and LFP Phreaks loss.

Show Me Your TD's:
Eliminated from playoff contention.

The East Division breaks down with slightly more complications as follows:

My Team Blows Again:
Clinches East Division Title with win.
Clinches East Division Wild Card with loss and Angry Asians loss.

Hail to the Chefs:
Clinches East Division Title with win and My Team Blows Again loss.
Clinches East Division Wild Card with win and My Team Blows Again win.
Clinches East Division Wild Card with loss and My Team Blows Again loss.

Angry Asians:
Clinches East Division Title with win and My Team Blows Again loss.

Party Animals:
Eliminated from playoff contention.

I Stiff Armed Your Mom:
Eliminated from playoff contention.

Long story short, it's a win-and-in situation for four teams, while a couple of squads need help from each other to make it, but all this spells is late season dramatics and excitement before the fourth season of LFPFFB enters the playoff spectacular that can only be settled on the biggest stage. Let the madness commence as we move toward the kickoff of Week 17!

Football Movie Marathon #15: Rudy (1993)

2009-12-24T23:27:00.000-08:00

Our second to last movie of the season is one of my favorites thusfar, 1993's Rudy, which could make a strong case as the best underdog sports movie (although Hoosiers and Rocky would probably beat it out).

Sean Astin (The Goonies, The Lord of the Rings) plays Daniel "Rudy" Ruettiger, a high school graduate in a steel town, expected to be a steel worker like every guy he knows. This is everyone's expectation except his own however; his goal is to play football at Notre Dame, a school that used to have a good football team in the era this movie is set. Rudy played high school ball, but was considered too small to be a collegiate player. Also problematic is his grades, which fall below the Notre Dame standards.

Rudy spends some time in the community college near Notre Dame to get the grades he needs. He also works with the groundscrew at the football field to be around the program. At one point while cleaning, he reads the famous speech from Knute Rockne: All American (1940) (reviewed earlier in marathon) off of a plaque in the locker room. Eventually his grades improve, and he gets into Notre Dame. He follows this accomplishment with an even bigger one, walking onto the practice squad by giving an effort that greatly impresses the coaches. From here we follow his quest to get onto the field for the rest of the movie.

The reason Rudy lives on as a sports movie classic is the gigantic emotional payoff at the end. I'm hard pressed to think of a sports movie with a better ending. It is probably one of the few movies that guys are allowed to cry during. There is more to it than just the ending of course. Despite giving us very little sports action from start to finish, the movie is never boring or meandering. Characters all seem well fleshed out....whereas in too many sports movies the writers seem content to give each character a gimmick and let them run with it. The only part of the story I didn't really like was the somewhat "bad guy" potarit they painted of Dan Devine. In the movie, Rudy doesn't make it onto the final games roster until the rest of the team appeals. In real life, it was actually Devine who rewarded Rudy for his hard work by sticking him in the game. I know its just a movie and all, but it seems cruel that they made one of his biggest supporters into one of his biggest opposers. The 5 or 10 minutes between Rudy finding out he didn't make the last game up until the decision is turned around is the worst part of the movie...just one hurdle too many for the lead character that throws off the balance a bit. Minor complaint though.

Merry Christmas

1) Any Given Sunday (1999)
2) Brian's Song (1971)
3) Rudy (1993)
4) Knute Rockne: All American (1940)
5) Varsity Blues (1999)
6) The Longest Yard (1974)
7) Small Potatoes: Who Killed the USFL? (2009)
8) Horse Feathers (1932)
9) Gridiron Gang (2006)
10) The Waterboy (1998)
11) The Band That Wouldn't Die (2009)
12) Little Giants (1994)
13) Invincible (2006)
14) The Longest Yard (2005)
15) Two For the Money (2005)

Monday Night Football Tonight Presents High Stakes

2009-12-21T12:54:00.000-08:00

Tonight during MNF football all eyes will be on the matchup between Tony's Hail to the Chefs, who need just 5.1 points to overcome Mike's Phreaks. The man who is up to bat for Tony is Steve Smith of the New York Giants, an LFPFFB All Pro this season. If Tony loses it could be rather diastourous to his playoff hopes. Because he is behind other playoff contenders in the tiebreaker categories, he basically needs to win from here on out to avoid missing out on the playoffs in what has so far been a promising rookie season. Both Jason's sharpened their playoff chances with wins, and should be rooting strongly for Mike to keep a contender off of their backs. Mike has a serious oppurtunity to make some headway in his own wild card push at the same time. With JJ's Curbstompers losing by a record 122 points, he has a good chance at tying things up in the wins column. Mike probably* needs to beat JJ out in wins, since he is down 0-2 in the head-to-head rankings. They could very well be playing for the playoff spot in week 17.

The other crucial matchup in limbo tonight is between Kyle's Fisters and Gas's Show Me Your TD's. Kyle has 4 players on deck tonight to make up his 16 point deficet, but Gas is playing Eli Manning, Brandon Jacobs and Kevin Boss to counter (these guys love the NY Giants I guess). If Kyle wins, he will catch JJ in the divisional standings...which would be huge given that he has the tiebreaker 2-1. Gas needs this win as well. He holds the tiebreaker over Mike, but is split 1-1 with both Kyle and JJ and has some ground to make up in the win column.

The other matchups all appear to already be decided, but all owners should be watching tonight. Massive playoff implications! playoffs!? you wanna talk about playoffs!? playoffs!?

*I think Mike could tie JJ in wins and still get the playoff spot in a 3-way tie. I think.

Football Movie Marathon #14: Little Giants (1994)

2009-12-18T11:57:00.000-08:00

Unlike all the other movies I've gone over thusfar, I haven't seen Little Giants in a long ass time. Something that probably won't be remedied anytime soon either. Anyways, this week the review is kind of mailed in....I'm tired and busy.

Anyways, Rick Moranis (Honey, I Shrunk the Kids) plays Danny O'Shea, the brother of a former Heisman trophy winner, Ed O'Neil (Married With Children). When Danny's daughter, among other kids, are cut from Pee Wee football by his brother, he decides to form his own team. Following the formula of, say, The Mighty Ducks, Danny's team is filled with girls, nerds, fat kids...you get the picture.

All kinds of wacky things ensue throughout the movie as is expected. The fat kid loves food so much that at one point he is storing a sandwich in his helmet. One kid accidently superglues his hands together. Danny's daughter, nicknamed "the Icebox" catapults one of the Cowboys (the rival team) into a muddy pond. My personal favorite is when Danny finds his quarterback by recruiting a kid who is throwing paper towel roles into his mother's shopping cart at the grocery store.

Anyways, I haven't been among the target audience for this movie in a dozen years or so. That said, it does hold a special place in my heart because I saw it for the first and only time at a slumber party when I was 12, where we stole a lot of my friend's dad's beer and tried to drink it. A lot of fun.

1) Any Given Sunday (1999)
2) Brian's Song (1971)
3) Knute Rockne: All American (1940)
4) Varsity Blues (1999)
5) The Longest Yard (1974)
6) Small Potatoes: Who Killed the USFL? (2009)
7) Horse Feathers (1932)
8) Gridiron Gang (2006)
9) The Waterboy (1998)
10) The Band That Wouldn't Die (2009)
11) Little Giants (1994)
12) Invincible (2006)
13) The Longest Yard (2005)
14) Two For the Money (2005)

Week 14: Game on!

2009-12-13T09:57:00.000-08:00

Here we go with Week 14, no game goes without importance here and the heavy hitting utility players are out in force! With a three-way tie for the wild card in the West and a four-way tie at the top of the East, every game matters this week and no opponent can be taken lightly. Get ready for some serious performances across the league in Week 14 of LFP Fantasy Football's fourth season playoff push!

Football Movie Marathon #13: Horse Feathers (1932)

2009-12-11T12:02:00.000-08:00

Let's go back in time 75+ years for the next movie.

The Marx Brothers came into the picture right when silent movies were going away and "talkies" were becoming popular. Many of their early movies are all time classics. In the American Film Institute Top 100 Comedies list, the Marx Brothers account for five of the movies, including this weeks entry, Horse Feathers.

Groucho Marx (perhaps the most recognizeable to modern audiences) plays Professor Wagstaff, who's son Frank (played by Zeppo Marx) is the captain of the football team. They haven't beaten their rival in years, so the Professor decides to hire some ringers. Unfortunately, highjinx ensue and he ends up with two bumblers he meets at a speakeasy (played by Harpo and Chico). Several antics lead up to the big football game, which finishes up the movie in an interesting and climatic way.

Overall however, with the Marx Brothers, the plot is secondary to cramming in as many jokes as humanly possible into the movies runtime. Watching several of their movies, you realize that the brothers are creating so much freaking anarchy that you have no real idea of what is going on. It is very, very silly from start to finish...squeezing in more jokes than a Family Guy episode (which doesn't even require plot).

The movie runs 68 minutes long and currently can be found on YouTube. Personally, I think its a hell of a lot of fun, but the Marx Brothers are definately a lot different that what anyone would expect from a comedy in this day and age. Characters verbally lob softballs at Groucho just so he can turn their phrases against them. There are extended music scenes which feel incredibly dated. Overall, this slides in somewhere in the middle of the marathon movies for me.

Football Movie Marathon Rankings:
1) Any Given Sunday (1999)
2) Brian's Song (1971)
3) Knute Rockne: All American (1940)
4) Varsity Blues (1999)
5) The Longest Yard (1974)
6) Small Potatoes: Who Killed the USFL? (2009)
7) Horse Feathers (1932)
8) Gridiron Gang (2006)
9) The Waterboy (1998)
10) The Band That Wouldn't Die (2009)
11) Invincible (2006)
12) The Longest Yard (2005)
13) Two For the Money (2005)

Week 13, let's get serious.

2009-12-06T10:03:00.000-08:00

Here we go, huge division match-ups all over the league as the playoff picture tries to get a little clearer. Free Agency is updated and rosters are available on the scoreboard, good luck to everyone but the West!

Football Movie Marathon #12: Gridiron Gang (2006)

2009-12-03T11:55:00.000-08:00

Sticking to the prisoners playing football theme from the last week, the next movie I'm going to look at is 2006's Gridiron Gang.

The story is one that is interesting enough. Sean Porter (played by Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson) works at a juvinile detention center filled with young members of opposing gangs. With everyone killing each other on the streets, the violence is also an issue with the inmates. To give the kids a chance, Porter attempts to unify them by making a football team to play against the local high schools.

Overall, the movie plays out like a very poor man's verision of The Wire mixed with Friday Night Lights. The football games are fun to watch, the gang war scenes come off as just a bit too heavy handed. The movie seems to flutter between how "real" and how "cliche sports movie" it wants to be, and the uneven tone hurts it. The recently reviewed Any Given Sunday is pretty over the top all the way through, and it works to its credit.

The best thing the film has going for it is the lead performance by the Rock. If I can digress for a minute, somewhere in the early to mid 90s, we decided that the Arnold and Stallone types were BAD actors, which I find kind of stupid. There has been a certain something lost in movies since then, and our action stars seem to be more in the Matt Damon/Keanu Reeves/Christian Bale/Hugh Jackman mold (or even the Tobey Maguire mold!). While those guys have all made solid action movies, I genuinely miss the 80s tough guys. Is there any lead action movie stars anymore as bad ass as the leads in First Blood or Predator? In my opinion, no. Hence I really like the Rock, because I feel like he is the only newer guy on the block that can do that kind of thing. Gridiron Gang isn't necessarily the appropriate vehicle, but I like any decent performance by a tough guy. Long story short, just because some one would look ridiculous performing Hamlet doesn't mean he is a bad actor, and I want real action stars back.* Anyways, the Rock is good in this and I want him away from the family movies and back into the action movies.

A football movie starring the Rock and Xzibit didn't seem to be what the public wanted, because I don't think too many people have seen this. If I'm not mistaken, this movie also came out within a month or two of Invincible, which was marketed and packaged a whole lot better. Too bad, because I think Gridiron Gang is the better of the two. Not anything too special, but worth a viewing if you ever get the chance.

Football Movie Marathon Rankings:

1) Any Given Sunday (1999)
2) Brian's Song (1971)
3) Knute Rockne: All American (1940)
4) Varsity Blues (1999)
5) The Longest Yard (1974)
6) Small Potatoes: Who Killed the USFL? (2009)
7) Gridiron Gang (2006)
8) The Waterboy (1998)
9) The Band That Wouldn't Die (2009)
10) Invincible (2006)
11) The Longest Yard (2005)
12) Two For the Money (2005)

*Arnold, Stallone, and Kurt Russel are the best at this. Not a big Segal or JCVD fan however.

Running Backs to Sort Out Pro Bowl Picture in Afternoon Games

2009-11-29T12:20:00.000-08:00

Oddly enough, the NFL decided to prominently feature our Pro Bowl Running Backs in their afternoon segment.

Four Games, each featuring either Maurice Jones-Drew, Chris Johnson, Ray Rice, or Adrian Peterson.

Tune in to see who breaks the Pro Bowl open for their respective conference.

Football Movie Marathon #10 & #11: The Longest Yard (1974 & 2005)

2009-11-26T10:13:00.000-08:00

Since last week required a brief sabbatical from the movies for me, I'm doubling shit up this week. Appropriately, I'm going to go with one of the better football movies and its not-so-great remake, both entitled The Longest Yard.

Bill Simmons was once working on a project someone like this one, reviewing the top 74 sports movies of the last 40 years or something of the sort. He wasn't going in any order, just sporadically picking whichever film he felt like talking about. He abandoned the project perhaps a tenth of the way through, only having wrote a review for one top 10 movie. Said movie was The Longest Yard, which placed third. High praise, considering he was writing about all sports movies. With Rocky, Raging Bull, Field of Dreams, Bull Durham, Hoop Dreams, Hoosiers, Juwanna Man and more still out there, its hard to envision a movie that so few people these days have seen being so high. Well, it was. Number 3. The 2005 version, starring Adam Sandler in the role previously occupied by Burt Reynolds, was bashed in his column just as much as the 1974 movie was praised.

The story is pretty simple. Paul Crewe (Reynolds/Sandler) is a former MVP quarterback that has been exiled by pro football for throwing games. Early in the films his alcohol fueled behavior lands him in prison. The guards have a talented football team and the evil warden wants Crewe to put together a team of prisoners to give the guards a tune up for their season. When the team of inmates looks more promising than expected, Crewe is tempted to revert back to his game throwing ways to placate the warden and be rewarded accordingly. This creates a serious dilemma, as he has earned the trust and respect of his teammates.

1974's version of the story is a fairly slowly paced drama with some solid comedy sprinkled throughout. In the time the movie was made, Burt Reynolds was one of those actors that defined manliness...sort of America's answer to Sean Connery. This role suits him well. Also serving him well is that he was an accomplished football player in his day, before being held back by injuries. He is certainley one of the actor's in a sports movie that actually appears to know what the hell he is doing (a huge plus in my book...stuff like Wesley Snipes dribbling up to his armpits in White Men Can't Jump drives me crazy). I suppose that my biggest complaint is that there is about 85 minutes of a movie I really like in this thing, but there is about a half hour that needed to be left on the cutting room floor. Important scenes are frequent, but too often there are just spots that meander 5 minutes to long that don't advance the story or make me laugh much. The whole climatic football game is shot in the same manner that a game in the 70s would be. Simmons praises this trait, while I was just kind of bored by it. Ever watched a Super Bowl or anything from the 70s? You get impaitent. Now on a football telecast they'll jam in a replay of the down, a peek at the coach, a look at the quarterback, etc between every play. It's really just kind of...plain at times. Overall the movie is really solid because the story is so good and there isn't anyone that seems to be miscast. It is a ways out of first on my football movie list (and will only go down farther, I'm saving quite a few movies I like for later or next year), but I can recommend it for sure.

The 2005 version plays out as more of a straight comedy, and is the second best Adam Sandler football movie ever. They really jampacked this thing with cameos...Nelly, Michael Irvin, Goldberg, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Kevin Nash, and a bunch of ESPN personalities (yes, for some reason ESPN is broadcasting a scrimmage of a prison football game....better than Around the Horn I suppose). Burt Reynolds himself even is there for a small role. The laughs really seem to come from these smaller roles more than the main characters. Sandler, Chris Rock, Tracey Morgan, etc just aren't that funny throughout in my mind. The movie also tweaks the story at the ending a little bit, and in my opinion, the change is a lot worse. So yeah, this one isn't very good, but certainley not a diaster like Little Nicky or something like that. Perhaps I would think a lot worse of it if I held the first one up to "sacred sports movie" status. I mean, it isn't like Adam Sandler is trying to be Rocky Balboa here...

So personally, while I think they aren't even close in terms of quality, I dont really think either is among the best or worst sports movies (I suppose the 2005 version is one of the worst football movies I've seen though). The old version is "just" good, the new version is pretty flat with some fun cameos and cheap laughs.

Football Movie Marathon Rankings:
1) Any Given Sunday (1999)
2) Brian's Song (1971)
3) Knute Rockne: All American (1940)
4) Varsity Blues (1999)

5) The Longest Yard (1974)
6) Small Potatoes: Who Killed the USFL? (2009)
7) The Waterboy (1998)
8) The Band That Wouldn't Die (2009)

9) Invincible (2006)
10) The Longest Yard (2005)
11) Two For the Money (2005)

First Annual LFP FFB Pro Bowl

2009-11-24T03:22:00.000-08:00

Week 12 rolls in with the regular excitement of any other LFP FFB week, but packs the promise of turkey dinners and tons of Thursday football to boot. Why not make this an even more special holiday week by enjoying our first ever LFP FFB Pro Bowl?! The All-East and All-West rosters are posted on the Week 12 Scoreboard page, and I'm happy to see that all ten teams in the league have a representative! As commissioner of the league, I've made the decision that this game will have no bearing on this season for anyone, but that is something we can discuss at the owner's meetings prior to the 2010 season of LFP FFB. Instead, I propose the following three outcomes, up for vote until Thursday morning just prior to the first game of the week, so don't delay in responding!

Proposal 1:
Losing division is responsible for purchasing the draft board and stickers for the 2010 LFP FFB Draft, average cost between $25-35.

Proposal 2:
Each winning division member will be allowed to give a losing division member a whipped cream pie in the face at the 2010 LFP FFB Draft. Highest point earner in winning division will pie highest point earner in losing division, and so on down to the lowest point earners.

Proposal 3:
Each losing division member will be assigned to a winning division member as their servant for food and drinks at the 2010 LFP FFB Draft.

Feel free to vote as soon as you can and if you have a better idea that has no bearing on this season, feel free to respond with it and try to garner votes!

-Commish

Week 11 Shaking the League Landscape

2009-11-23T01:24:00.000-08:00

We've seen a lot of tight games this week heading into Monday Night Football, and we also watched J-Jak get blown up by my mom... Yep, she's at it again leading the league in scoring this week.

The Stiffies are poised to drop a heartbreaker to J.J.'s Curbstomping hoodlums thanks to matching zeros by free agent pickup John Carlson and supposed accuracy king Nick Folk, sucks to miss a field goal that costs the game, doesn't it?

Meanwhile back in the West we had a pair of matchups, one directly involving playoff positioning for the upcoming weeks between the LFP Phreaks and Kyle's Fisters. Kyle got great performances from Detroit studs Kevin Smith and LFP Benedict Arnold, Megatron, combining for 43 points, but his poor QB play out of Cutler and Romo left the door open for nice showings by DeAngelo Williams, THE Steve Smith, Pierre Thomas, and utility man Carson Palmer to leave it at a 1.3 point game... Matt Schaub is lurking on Monday Night Football's main stage to try and steal this victory for the Phreaks, and give the squad some breathing room at third in the West.

In the other West Division showdown, first place runaway Breaston My Face is staring down the barrel of fellow mammary allusionist squad Show Me Your TD's gun heading into Monday night. Jared holds a nice little 15.05 point lead while hiding Andre Johnson for this potentially rainy day, but Sean's TD's look to get big behind Chris Johnson and the Tennessee defense once again. This one could get interesting...

Over in the East we had one heck of a barn-burner between the minority contingent in the league, as the Angriest Asians took out Tony Le's gaggle of Chefs by a narrow margin. 261.05 points between the two teams is an achievement, but Roethlisberger and Rodgers edged out Brady and Favre in this one by just 4.34, which makes you wonder why Favre wasn't crying once again this Sunday.

And of course this brings us to the laugher of the week... Just under 40 points as a margin of difference between Vick's Party Animals and J-Jak's crew of Blowpops as Jason's team lived up to their label. Peyton Manning, Adrian Peterson, and Ray Rice are typically unstoppable, but apparently Drew Brees, Hines Ward, Wes Welker, Heath Miller, and Visanthe Shiancoe took their blue collar tour of devestation to the division leaders in a big way. Eat it J-Jak, and mom says to tell your parents hello... Ouch.

Enjoy MNF, should be fun to watch as always.

-Commish

No Movie this Week

2009-11-19T11:56:00.001-08:00

Too busy...

Football Movie Marathon #9: Any Given Sunday (1999)

2009-11-11T11:38:00.000-08:00

The next movie in our marathon is Any Given Sunday, by director Oliver Stone (Platoon, JFK, Wall Street). The film features an all star cast: Al Pacino as the old school coach, Cameron Diaz as the recently installed team owner, Dennis Quaid as the grizzled-veteran quarterback, and Jaimee Foxx as the star backup quarterback. After these principal figures the supporting cast is absolutely stacked as well, featuring James Woods, Matthew Modine, Aaron Eckhart, Charlton Heston, Elisabeth Berkley*, John C McGinely, Bill Bellamy, Lauren Holly and LL Cool J. Then after THAT you get a whos who of football players: Jim Brown, Dick Butkus, the real LT, TO, Ricky Watters, Johnny Unitas, and Warren Moon. Good Lord. I probably know the names of more people in this freaking movie than any other I've ever seen.

So with all these actors and fun older players floating around what is the actual result? In my opinion, its somewhere between the most flawed masterpiece film has ever seen and a big guilty pleasure. Watching this movie is such a befuddling experience that it is difficult to put into words.

So to begin, the bad and ugly stuff. The gameplay scenes in the movie leave a whole lot to be desired. First off, the editing resembles a music video or something, leaving you no real orientation as to what is ever going on in the game. This was really offputting to me for the most part. You know how in some of the fights in The Bourne Ultimatium it seems like they just put a camera on Matt Damon's belt buckle or something and had him kick ass? It is a lot like that, only handled with a lot less skill and care. The camera is always shaking all over the place as if the person is trying to shoot the scene while running on a treadmill or something. Second, the lack of an NFL license is incredibly annoying. The uniforms and appearance of the game in general are ridiculous. Its also kind of off putting how they seem to transplant NFL history into their own leauge: "You'll NEVAHHH be Joe Montana!". I suppose that if asked to defend the style of the movie Stone would likely say that since the drama in the movie is so heightened above what is more or less reality, the action and the appearance should be too. I guess that I can buy that. One of the problems with that Playmakers show ESPN did a few years back was that they couldn't balance the overall craziness against a realistic backdrop ("I'm the best player on this team; I'm also gay")**. Any Given Sunday balances itself well, even if said balancing act gets tiresome and seems like it has had too much caffiene occasionally.

There are several really great dramatic scenes in the movie though that are really where it takes off. Pacino watching TV sadly as he is skewered by a Jim Rome type TV show host. Foxx's personal life falling off the tracks while his public persona soars (highlighted by a hilarious music video "My Name is Willie". Quaid's horribly tense scenes where he mulls retirement while his wife presses him toward staying in the game (wonder what goes on in the Favre and Warner households?). The subplot with LT's character is really interesting too. Essentially, he is playing and get an insentive based million dollar bonus and risking his life to do so, while team doctors argue over the ethics of letting him continue. The movie really breathes through these characters, and is only really slowed down for Diaz and LL, who are significantly less interesting in my opinion. The centerpiece of the movie is a giant Pacino speech before the big game, perhaps my favorite moment of his as an actor that isn't from a 70s movie.

I remember somewhat disliking this movie when I caught it in the theatres 10 years ago. Perhaps it was the fact I was with my parents and it was much more inappropriate then advertised (nudity from both genders...). Honestly, the awkwardness of seeing something you probably shouldn't be seeing with a parental figure can really hurt your opinion of a movie (Why are you doing this to me!?), and this was the second worst of these occasions in my life***. There was also a bit more purity to sports then, at least in my mind. Maybe I just wasn't ready to see a behind the scenes depiction in such an embellished and blunt fashion. I don't know. Watching the movie recently however, I really gained a new appreciation for the whole thing. I'm putting the movie at number 1 for now. Hopefully the 3 of you that read this aren't going to flip out over that.

Football Movie Marathon Rankings:

1) Any Given Sunday (1999)

2) Brian's Song (1971)

3) Knute Rockne: All American (1940)

4) Varsity Blues (1999)

5) Small Potatoes: Who Killed the USFL? (2009)

6) The Waterboy (1998) up a few spots by popular demand and a rewatch

7) The Band That Wouldn't Die (2009)

8) Invincible (2006)

9) Two For the Money (2005)

*For all the Showgirls fans out there

** For a terrific reinactment of this scene in any scenario, whether it makes sense or not, talk to Kyle Stinson. btw, I love that the actor they have playing the all-pro wide reciever is a white guy that looks about 5'-4"

***The first was seeing He Got Game (1997) with a friend and his mother.

8 & Out

2009-11-09T00:44:00.000-08:00

We're going streaking! Actually, we're not anymore, J.J. rained anger and furious vengeance on Jared's squad on Sunday to end the record-tying win streak at eight games. Meanwhile, Vick's trying to mount an interesting comeback on Wong, where Wong's QB utility man will have to lead the comeback... Interesting week to say the least, stay tuned for the thrilling Monday night conclusion!

Week 9 GO!

2009-11-08T09:50:00.000-08:00

Rosters are up, here we go!

Some Semblance of Order

2009-11-07T08:35:00.000-08:00

One real life sports element that has never transferred to the fantasy world (at least to my knowledge) is All Star Games. Given how bad the all-star games are in some sports, namely the Pro Bowl in football, one might say this is a good thing. Despite this, I was just kicking around an idea that might be fun to try out.

What if, on week 11 or 12 of the season, when all the players have had their bye weeks, we had a seperate little side matchup in addition to the regular games for the week. The extra matchup would be between the East and West divisons, featuring the best players in leauge. Basically we would go to the leauge leaders pages and take the best QB, two RBs, three WRs, TE, K, and DEF from each division and match them up with those of the other division. Of course, they would still be allowed to play in their regular matchup as well (for example, Drew Brees score for the week would count for both the Party Animals and the East Division All Stars).

The team that wins the ASG would get a small reward. For example, each owner in the winning division would get $5 free agency money, or each winning player would bring $2 back to their owner, or something.

Just trying to think outside the box a little bit....

Football Movie Marathon #8: The Waterboy (1998)

2009-11-05T12:02:00.000-08:00

Time to go in the exact opposite direction of the documentary movies and onto the Adam Sandler college football comedy, The Waterboy.

Sandler plays Bobby Boucher, the waterboy for a major college football program who is fired and has to go work for a much less prestigous school also in the nearby vicinity. Always picked on, Boucher takes a lot of crap from everybody, until he finally snaps and learns to channel all of his anger onto the football field. With encouragement from Coach Klien (the Fonz himself, Henry Winkler) and his love interest (Fairuza Balk, American History X), Boucher becomes one of the best defensive players in the nation and the sparkplug to pull his team of misfits from their losing ways.

Most of the comedy from the movie is derived from the ridiculous way Sandler plays the character, stammering constantly in a ridiculous voice. This is blended with a goofy supporting cast, including Rob Schneider playing the "You can DO IT!" guy in his first (and only necessary) appearence in Sandler comedies.

Overall its a pretty silly movie with some laughs, falling somewhere in the middle to low range of Sandler's movies. Some people seem to have the tendency to label Sandler a one trick pony, a critiscm that I don't think is all that fair. In Punch-Drunk Love and Happy Gilmore, I think Sandler gives two of the better comedic roles I have ever seen, and those movies are quite different from one another. It is in the roles like The Waterboy and Little Nicky where the whole funny voice gimmick starts to feel like an overly streched out SNL sketch and gets a little tedious.

It's probably unfair to group this with the likes of the movies I have written about so far, but its my list and I can do what I want to. I'll get some more comedies in here soon (including another Sandler film nonetheless) to make this one look a little more at home.

Football Movie Rankings
1) Brian's Song (1971)
2) Knute Rockne All American (1940)
3) Small Potatoes: Who Killed the USFL? (2009)
4) Varsity Blues (1999)
5) The Band That Wouldn't Die (2009)
6) Invincible (2006)

7) The Waterboy (1998)
8) Two For the Money (2005)

Week 8 Wrap-Up

2009-11-03T16:43:00.000-08:00

Wow, what a week! Why waste time talking, let's get into the results.

Breaston My Face 125.15 vs. I Stiff Armed Your Mom 96.7
Craig looked to stop Jared's team from tying his two-time record of eight consecutive wins in the 2006 season, but behind a huge day from MJD (34.3 points) it was in the stars for Breaston My Face. Craig countered with strong days from Donovan McNabb (23.4 pts) and Matt Forte in his farewell effort with 24.1 points, but it was too little too late and this one wasn't close.

My Team Blows Again 111.05 vs. Angry Asian 106.75
Peyton (17.35 pts), Purple Jesus (20.1 pts), Ray Rice(16.8), and V-Jax (16.3 pts) all had big-time days in a big time game where J-Jak just edged defending East Division champ Wong, extending the lead for the Blowers and Angering Asians even more. Rodgers (30.55 pts) had a huge day to match S-Jax (22.6 pts) and LT (17.6 pts), but boy that New Orleans defense (12 pts) couldn't combine with Devery Henderson (4.9 pts) to do enough for Wong this time. Close one at the wire, but with Henderson's TD chance getting picked off it just wasn't meant to be.

Hail to the Chefs 67.8 vs. Party Animals 95.6
Well Brett Favre went for 28.2 points, but that was it for the Chefs this week as Tony Le's squad lost the second straight match-up against the Party Animals. Brees continued to roll with 21.7 points this week and led the charge for Vick's team who suddenly owns the wild card spot in the East just ahead of the aforementioned Chefs.

Fister? I hardly know her. 75.7 vs. Lynnhood Curbstompers 99.3
In another big division match-up, J.J.'s Curbstompers said goodbye to Sidney Rice after his four point effort, and hello to Michael Turner's 21.1 and Reggie Wayne's 20.7 points. That would prove to be the nail in the coffin for Fister this week as Kyle's squad couldn't muster much to support Romo's 24.8 point effort.

LFP Phreaks 108 vs. Show Me Your TD's 110.95
What a heartbreaker for the Phreaks this week and a HUGE win for Sean's TD's. Chris Johnson threw down 40.9 points on Sunday, making a Monday night comeback look unlikely, but with Pierre Thomas posting two touchdowns in a 21 point effort, the Phreaks were in it until the wire, and if Thomas wasn't pulled for Reggie Bush on the goal line or Darren Sharper held on to a missed interception of Matt Ryan (16.35 pts) things would be the other way around. Either way, this division just got a lot tighter!

On to next week! Good luck.

-Commish

Week 9: A Look Ahead

2009-11-02T09:00:00.000-08:00

Week 9 Matchups:
My Team Blows Again @ LFP Phreaks
  Angry Asians @ Party Animals
  Fister? I hardly know her. @ Show Me Your TD's
  Hail to the Chefs @ I Stiff Armed Your Mom
  Lynnhood Curbstompers @ Breaston My Face

Monday, November 2nd:
Monday Night Football - Pittsburgh Steelers @ Denver Broncos, 5:30pm PT

Tuesday, November 3rd:
Free Agency Opens on Forum - 12:00pm PT
Blog - Week 8 Wrap-Up by Mike

Wednesday, November 4th:
Blog - Week 9 Breakdown by Mike

Thursday, November 5th:
Blog - Football Movie Marathon by Jared

Friday, November 6th:
Blog - Team Owner Profile: Sean Gaskill/Nick Perrault by Mike

Saturday, November 7th:
Free Agency Closes on Forum - 5:00pm PT
Blog - Some semblance of order... by Mike

Sunday, November 8th:
Roster Submissions Due - 9:30am PT

Favre does it again...

2009-11-01T16:23:00.000-08:00

How soon will we see Brett Favre crying at his post-game press conference about such an emotional win? Tick tock tick tock...

Scores Updated

2009-11-01T14:04:00.000-08:00

Scores are updated on the homepage and the Week 8 Scoreboard to reflect all the action from the morning games. Ch-ch-ch-ch-check it out!

Guess who shows up?!

2009-11-01T10:37:00.001-08:00

...on the bench! T.O.'s official tweet from the sidelines: "How can you not start me?! [sob sob]"

Fast start!

2009-11-01T10:22:00.000-08:00

...on the bench! Boy does it hurt to watch that 64-yard TD knowing you decided it would be a tough match-up. Just the first second-guessing moment of the day!

Week 8 Hits NOW!

2009-11-01T09:40:00.000-08:00

Website, rosters, scoreboard, and all your dreams are updated! An extra hour to sleep off your Halloween hangover (mom...) and here comes football! Good luck to everyone!

Team Owner Profile: Jason Wong

2009-10-30T12:08:00.000-07:00

Here at the LFP offices we try to get our interview subjects when they're having their worst struggles or they're on a high, just so we can say we turned it around if they should win or lose really. Who better to profile under such circumstances than Jason Wong, our second straight member of the AZN Invasion of LFP Fantasy. Mr. Wong is going into the eighth week of the season as a third year member of the league trying to defend two straight division titles, which is unheard of in our league. A renowned trash-talker, an infamous chest kicker, and a man I'm proud to call my friend, he wandered through the doors here in LFP with a sinister look on his face so we sat him down for an interview to talk about his five-loss season so far...

LFP FFB: Hey Jason, thanks for stopping in to talk to us.

Jason Wong: I'm going to kill you.

LFP: Haha I know...

JW: ...

LFP: That is a horrifying look on your face. Can you tell me, is it really easy or really hard to have as bad a start as you have had?

JW: Fuck you.

LFP: So it's pretty easy then?

JW: Yeah! Really easy, all I have to do is play my fucking worthless roster and they have been able to lose every fucking game except the new guy, because I'm more Asian, and Jakubiak because he's a bitch.

LFP: So you beat Tony because you're more Asian and J-Jak because you're a bigger bitch? That's an interesting strategy to take in fantasy football that I've never heard of. What are you going to do to win the rest of your games under that thought process?

JW: First I'm going to reach in your chest and pull your heart out and shove it down your throat.

LFP: Haha... ha... Jokes are fun. Does J-Jak every remind you of that dude "Baby GAP" who you kicked through the doorway?

JW: Yes.

LFP: So would you plan on "BOOM"ing him this week when you play him for the second time?

JW: Yes. Fuck you.

LFP: I mean seriously, L.T. with the 12th overall pick? Talk about your all-time backfires...

JW: Fuck you, I'm leaving, and then I'm going to kill you in your sleep.

LFP: Great talking to you too...

Knowing the amount of anger that's packed inside that little guy I would not want to be J-Jak this week, just because Wong is likely to actually try and kill someone if he loses again. Either way there's a lot of East Division status at stake in that game so stay tuned as we roll towards Week 8's games!

-Commish

Football Movie Marathon #7: Small Potatoes: Who Killed the USFL? (2009)

2009-10-29T12:00:00.000-07:00

While many leauges have tried to capitalize on America's love for football, arguably none of them have drawn as much interest as the USFL, a spring leauge for professional football in the 80s.

Michael Tollin helms this film in the ESPN 30 for 30 series, and of the 3 I have seen thus far, it is certainly the best. The documentary tells the story of the 3 year run of a leauge that was seemingly miles ahead of say, the XFL or Arena Football. For it's brief history, the USFL was home to coaches like Jim Mora and Steve Spurrier, and also to players such as Jim Kelly, Steve Young, Herschel Walker, Rick Neuheisel, and Doug Flutie. So why did it fail?

The movie delves into the attempt by the USFL to compete with the NFL, a push spearheaded by the owner of the New Jersey franchise, Donald Trump. Throughout the film, there are intercut snippets from an interview between Trump and Tollin. Trump's statement are then opposed by heartfelt interviews with former players, and this is where the movie really draws my interest. The USFL had such a great thing going, but the desire to play at the same time of year as the NFL was its undoing. Some of the players and personalities look back with bitterness, but they ALL look back with fondness.

Tollin displays a great potarit of what was essientally "The Little Spring Leauge that Could". The documentary somehow made me feel nostalgic for a brand of football that I have never seen. Anyways, this thing is all over the Internet...Youtube, iTunes, etc. It also shows on TV fairly frequently. If you get the chance to see it, I give a hearty recommendation.

Next week I'll get away from documentaries for awhile. Get something a little bit more well known out there.

Football Movie Marathon Rankings

Brian's Song (1971)
Knute Rockne All American (1940)

Small Potatoes: Who Killed the USFL? (2009)

Varsity Blues (1999)

The Band That Wouldn't Die (2009)

Invincible (2006)

Two For the Money (2005)

Week 8 Breakdown

2009-10-28T09:00:00.000-07:00

X's & O's: A Team-by-Team Breakdown

Breaston My Face (7-0)
MJD is back at the RB1 position, and after a week off remains the second leading scorer for running backs in LFP Fantasy. With the cheap addition of Ricky Williams at the RB2 slot, it looks like Jared's squad has become that much better after an undefeated start, a scary prospect to be certain. Strategically speaking, this should be business as usual in Week 8, with no key players out on bye weeks and decent match-ups across the board there shouldn't be any need for a QRW Utility usage (QB, RB, or WR in the Utility slot), and I'd bank on seeing two defenses pending free agent moves. Jared is going for the league record of 8 consecutive wins, currently held by Craig's 2006 squad who did it twice that season.

My Team Blows Again (5-2)
Coming off of a week where he had to deal with a ton of bye weeks, Jason now has to deal with another four of them. After burning a QRW Utility usage in Week 7 look for some movement on the TE/K/DEF department in Free Agency this week, as he fills holes at TE and Utility caused by the aforementioned bye week issue. The Peyton/ADP duo is a no-brainer, but it's a tossup at the RB2 position. Baltimore and Nate Burleson should return to action in Week 8, and there won't be too much mystery as to what we'll see from this squad lineup-wise. J-Jak is looking to distance himself from the pack this week in the East.

LFP Phreaks (4-3)
Two glaring aspects for this team in Week 8: RB2 and WR1. Pierre Thomas has been very inconsistent behind DeAngelo Williams, so this may need to be addressed in the form of adding another running back to a short stable. Beyond that, the best WR on the team Randy Moss is sitting down for his bye week and leaves a big gap with the inconsistent play at the position for this team. It will be interesting to see if Terrell Owens will be trusted to fill in or if more help will be required. Kevin Curtis remains injured and on the active roster, likely running out of time as a fantasy player, so there is certainly space to be filled. Starters look fairly clear for the week, with a two-TE situation looking likely at the Utility slot since Gostkowski sits with Moss. Harris needs to come back strong after another division loss in Week 7, barely hanging on to the West Division Wild Card at the moment.

Fister? I hardly know her. (4-3)
Kyle's team has no bye week issues as he faces a division opponent, allowing him complete freedom to play the match-ups in front of him. The biggest question mark for Week 8 will be whether or not Megatron is ready to go against a pathetic St. Louis team, and that would be a shame for the #7 overall pick to miss this one. Kyle's riding a nice win back into a tie for second place in the West.

Hail to the Chefs (4-3)
Tony is hurting a little on account of byes heading into Week 8. Tom Brady, Dwayne Bowe, Jeff Reed, and Pittsburgh all sit down in a crucial divisional game against the team right behind him in the standings. Favre should get his first start appropriately against the Packers back at Lambeau for the first time, and the RB situation is wide open for the four healthy backs on his roster. Donald Brown's injury in Indy shouldn't play much of a role in this week's decision-making, but he might use that to fill a potential hole in his receiving corps this week with Pierre Garcon's production diminishing. Look for a kicker search in Free Agency, and don't be surprised to see a QRW Utility usage of a third running back in an important game. Tony comes off of a loss which took him out of first in the East Division.

Party Animals (3-4)
The WR situation will be the one to watch for Vicki's team this week, as she loses both Wes Welker and Hines Ward to their bye weeks, not to mention Cedric Benson at RB and Heath Miller at TE. Drew Brees is the no-brainer key for this offense the rest of the season, and the RB situation seems fairly obvious with Westbrook's concussion lingering after Monday Night Football. With Carlson at TE and Crosby at K, the team looks pretty well intact despite the bye weeks, and free agency should be focused on potentially filling the WR slot if there are any bargain players to be had (ala Miles Austin in Week 7). Vick is looking to ride a two-game winning streak and huge point outputs back into the wild card lead if she can win in Week 8.

I Stiff Armed Your Mom (2-5)
Craig is hoping that things will start coming together, and counts heavily on Frank Gore flourishing in the second half thanks to a potentially renewed passing game. As Santonio Holmes heads out on his bye week, T.J. Houshmandzadeh looks to return to the lineup against Dallas, clearing up any issues at WR. RB is where it may get interesting based on match-ups though. Matt Forte has a good match-up with Cleveland and could see the RB2 spot behind Thomas Jones because of Mendenhall's bye week and San Francisco's trip to Indy. Cooley's bye week/injury leaves a hole at the TE spot, but Free Agency should clear up the situation, if not a trade with a TE heavy team. Craig comes off a big walloping at the hands of the Party Animals, and looks to knock off Jared's squad before he can tie the old 2006 record for consecutive wins set by none other than Craig himself, and a big win it would be for the Stiffies.

Lynnhood Curbstompers (2-5)
J.J. has a couple of big play-makers on the bench with bye weeks in Clinton Portis and Santana Moss, but the only glaring hole will be that RB2 spot vacated by Portis. Felix Jones hasn't produced much since returning from injury, so it will be interesting to see what route is taken for the week in trying to fill the spot. Sidney Rice and Percy Harvin provide enough depth at the WR3 position, but Free Agency will undoubtedly be used to fill the DEF spot that Tampa Bay proved incapable of filling before their bye week. I would expect to see both Hasselbeck and Warner in the lineup using a QRW Utility usage to try and win an important divisional match-up with Kyle and stop the three game skid.

Show Me Your TD's (2-5)
Gas comes off a nice division win against J.J. and has no bye week issues to deal with. I wouldn't anticipate seeing a QRW Utility usage with only three remaining for the season, but his style hasn't necessarily been conventional, or informed, to this point. Depth is good at just about every position, so it will be interesting to see if Chris Johnson comes back in at RB, as well as to see what combination of WR's make-up the starting line-up in Week 8. Good week to look forward to as Gas need only play the match-ups and watch his team put points up. The TD's are looking to break 100 for the second time this season in an important division game to get back into the mix in the West.

Angry Asians (2-5)
Statistically the worst team in the league, Wong plays an important game against the first place team in the East, but has only Roethlisberger on a bye in Week 8. The biggest spot to address will be the RB2 position behind S-Jax who has a great match-up against Detroit. Tomlinson and McGahee have not taken the reigns on a starting spot, but my guess would be to see what McGahee can do after LT's inability to get in the end zone was highlighted last week. There is enough depth at WR to find a starting three that will compliment Rodgers against Minnesota, and I'd venture a guess that we will see Wong's first QRW Utility usage here in Week 8. Wong hasn't won since Week 4 against this very same J-Jak team, and looks to re-enter the race in the East with a win.

Week 8 Betting Lines
801 Breaston My Face -25.1
802 I Stiff Armed Your Mom +25.1

803 My Team Blows Again -27.01

804 Angry Asians +27.01

805 Hail to the Chefs +6.51

806 Party Animals -6.51

807 Fister? I hardly know her. -6.4

808 Lynnhood Curbstompers +6.4

809 LFP Phreaks -16.28

810 Show Me Your TD's +16.28

Good luck to everyone in Week 9!

-Commish

Week 7 Wrap-Up

2009-10-27T01:50:00.000-07:00

Umm, anybody laughing at the the only woman in the league this week or last week? No, I don't mean Kyle, I mean my mom Vicki. Yeah, my mom, she's put up a two week total of 312.25 points, which if I'm not mistaken is a league record for points over the course of two weeks. Holy balls. On to the week in review...

Fister? I hardly know her. 91.45 vs. Angry Asians 87
I may have misspoken last week about which team was hapless in this league, as Wong's two-time defending East Division champion Angry Asians fall once again, this time to Kyle's friendly Fisters. Steve Slaton paced Kyle's squad with 19.9 points on an otherwise unspectacular day by both sides. The only competition put up by the Asians was Aaron Rodgers' 26.6 and Stephen Jackson's 13.3 points on a huge rushing day, but with nobody else but the New Orleans defense (17 pts) breaking double-digits you can't expect too much and that's just what they got.

Hail to the Chefs 119.7 vs. My Team Blows Again 124.75
In a great game with first place in the East Division at stake, J-Jak blew Tony away by just 5.05 points. Arguably the most deadly duo in the league, Peyton Manning (23.65) and Adrian Peterson (18.9) got big contributions from Vincent Jackson (20.2) and Chad Ochocinco (23.8) at the wide receiver spot to out-duel Tony a spirited battle. Tom Brady (25.9) couldn't gun-sling his way past his sworn rival, despite big help from Ryan Grant with 21.1 points and a huge defensive effort by Pittsburgh and Green Bay combining for 32 points. Great game with big division standing implications heading in to week 8!

I Stiff Armed Your Mom 72.6 vs. Party Animals 154.3
Well Craig, it looks like my mom stiff armed you... I take it back from earlier in this post too, the Stiffies just looked hapless again! Vick posted another huge number, outscoring everyone else on the week behind four players that scored 26.6 points or more, including a NY Jets defense that threw down the gauntlet with 27. Miles Austin rewarded the big $4 price-tag with a fat 28.1 points, not too shabby. Craig countered with Thomas Jones who impressed for the second straight week, posting 17.4 points, but things need to improve in the Stiff Arm camp if they are going to right this ship and get back in to contention.

Lynnhood Curbstompers 72.55 vs. Show Me Your TD's 99.5
In a battle at the bottom of the West Division, J.J.'s gangsters enthusiasm was curbed for sure as Gas put together a winning effort thanks to an explosion by Vernon Davis (27.3) at the TE position. Combined with four others in double-digits, Gaskill's crew fought hard for their second win of the season and crept out of last place, active defensive unit or no! Lynnhood seemed severely underrepresented as Kurt Warner and Reggie Wayne were the only two who showed up to play, scoring 14.25 and 14.3 respectively. Both teams will battle to right the ship and get right back in to the wild card mix while it's still within reach.

LFP Phreaks 100.1 vs. Breaston My Face 147.35
For the second straight week it's been Breaston My Face dominating the division competition, extending a near-record winning streak to seven games! Philip Rivers and Ricky Williams each put up 27.2 points to start the fire on Sunday, and then DeSean Jackson extinguished any hope for an LFP Phreaks team that looked completely outgunned in Week 7. Despite a 100+ point performance for the Phreaks, highlighted by Matt Schaub, DeAngelo Williams, and Donald Driver combining for 56.4 points (over 50% of the team total), it was never a terribly close match-up.

Week 8 looks to hold a lot of interest for a lot of teams, so let's head forward as we close the book on Week 7.

-Commish

Week 8: A Look Ahead

2009-10-26T10:00:00.000-07:00

Week 8 Matchups:
Breaston My Face @ I Stiff Armed Your Mom
My Team Blows Again @ Angry Asians
Hail to the Chefs @ Party Animals
Fister? I hardly know her. @ Lynnhood Curbstompers
LFP Phreaks @ Show Me Your TD's

Monday, October 26th:
Monday Night Football - Philadelphia Eagles @ Washington Redskins, 5:30pm PT

Tuesday, October 27th:
Free Agency Opens on Forum - 12:00pm PT
Blog - Week 7 Wrap-Up by Mike

Wednesday, October 28th:
Blog - Week 8 Breakdown by Kyle

Thursday, October 29th:
Blog - Football Movie Marathon by Jared

Friday, October 30th:
Blog - Team Owner Profile: Jason Wong by Mike

Saturday, October 31st:
Free Agency Closes on Forum - 5:00pm PT
Blog - Some semblance of order... by Mike

Sunday, November 1st:
Roster Submissions Due - 9:30am PT

Week 7, ready, set... GO!

2009-10-25T09:53:00.000-07:00

Rosters are up on the Week 7 Scoreboard, here we go!

Football Movie Marathon #6: The Band That Wouldn't Die

2009-10-22T11:28:00.000-07:00

ESPN's currently running "30 for 30" series of documentaries should provide me with quite the amount of material for this little marathon project. The first football movie brought forward is The Band That Wouldn't Die, directed by Barry Levinson (Rain Man, Diner, The Natural).

Owner Robert Isray moved the Baltimore Colts to Indianapolis in the middle of the night in March of 1984. Absent from all of the equipment taken to the new city were the band insturments and uniforms. The Baltimore Colts band stayed together for years after the movement of their team, playing pretty much anywhere that would have them as a statement of desire to have the NFL back in their city. The movie chronicles the trials and tribulations of both the band and the football fans of Baltimore, including interviews with band members, politicans, and people in both the Colts and Ravens organization.

Ironically for me, this movie came out the same day as the documentary Sonicsgate, a detailed synopsis of the recent loss of the Sonics here in Seattle. Obviously, I am very biased in comparing the two, but for me, where Band falls short is in capturing the despair and the anger. Don't get me wrong, it is a great story, but it needs to be reinforced. Sonicsgate features in depth interviews with Brian Robinson (co-founder of Save Our Sonics) and Sherman Alexi (novelist and ex-season ticket holder) that are really the heartbeat and the voice of the fan in the movie. Perhaps because Baltimore now has a top notch franchise, it was more difficult to capture that aggrevation in the ESPN flick. Bring NBA back here and I know I will feel a hell of a lot better.

Despite my somewhat mixed reactions to The Band That Wouldn't Die, it is a very good story and a documentary that is worth watching. If you aren't following the "30 for 30" thing on ESPN, I think you should be.

Football Movie Marathon Rankings
1. Brian's Song
2. Knute Rockne All American
3. Varsity Blues
4. The Band That Wouldn't Die
5. Invincible
6. Two For the Money

Week 6 Wrap-Up

2009-10-20T04:14:00.000-07:00

Week 6 came, went, and kicked the ass of every other week we've had in the history of the league! Nine out of ten teams in the league broke 100 points like it was no effort at all, and eight players on starting rosters posted more than 30 points this week. With that kind of production around the league it makes for an exciting Tuesday morning review.

Angry Asians 116.2 vs. LFP Phreaks 149.4
Scoring a shade over 116 points is usually a pretty good indicator that you had a winning week, but when Matt Schaub, DeAngelo Williams, and Randy Moss all decide to put together good games it is hard to keep up. You know, if Stephen Jackson and Mike Sims-Walker weren't on awful teams, this game could have been awfully close, and maybe contended for the all time combined scoring record. However, as it stands the third leading scorers for the week, the LFP Phreaks take home a win without any complaints, and on the other end Wong and co. can't help but dream about the defensive touchdowns that both New Orleans and Minnesota had called back... It's a cruel cruel world.

Party Animals 157.95 vs. Show Me Your TD's 76.15
It's pretty amazing to look at this score and see that my own mother more than doubled the score of a friend of mine, but to use the often imitated line, "that just happened." Yes, it did. Gas managed to have the only team in the league that missed out on the 100 point train that ran through with a vengeance, and what a rough spot to fail against my mother. Drew Brees returned to the rarefied air he sniffed against Detroit by posting a 40.05, plus Wes Welker and Hines Ward combined to tack on 47.9 more points, meaning that those three players alone beat the TD's by themselves. It was ugly, it was interesting, and more than anything it was a brutal beat down. The good news is, the record for biggest blowout didn't get broken, so the shame won't go on the books forever. Congrats to both of you.

Lynnhood Curbstompers 111 vs. Hail to the Chefs 161.5
Ummm, wow Tony, nice game. J.J. nor anyone else saw this one coming, as Tom Brady took a snowstorm and made it into his bitch during the second quarter of his game against Tennessee, and 48 fantasy points later he helped make Mr. Le's team the leading scorer for the week in his profile week. Add a ridiculous performance by Green Bay's defense against the Detroit Lions good for 28 points, compare that to the top player on the Curbstompers, Sidney Rice (22.6 points), shake it up and pour it over ice and we're all Hailing the Chefs. Thanks for taking the hit J.J., you poor man.

I Stiff Armed Your Mom 128.8 vs. My Team Blows Again 103.65
The battle of roommates proved to be an intriguing one, right up until Thomas Jones decided to run for over 200 yards. Joe Flacco and the aforementioned T.J. led the hapless Stiffies to their second win of the season, fending off an incredible performance by Ray Rice, who came in to the week as ADP's understudy until the dust settled. Division positions stay relatively the same, but the pride in the household has shifted in favor of the resurgent Stiff ones.

Breaston My Face 129.1 vs. Fister? I hardly know her. 117.3
In the most interesting game of the week to follow, Jared's Breaston Kyle's Face stayed undefeated after week six of the season. Though Kyle took a lead into Sunday, the combination of Philip Rivers and Nate Kaeding came through on Monday night to counter the efforts of Brandon Marshall. A close game with what seemed to be a foregone conclusion that came true after all, but who doesn't love watching the last game of the week with something on the line so they can worry and get that much more intense about it.

T'was a wonderful week for football, and who wouldn't want to see scores like those every week?!

-Commish

Week 7: A Look Ahead

2009-10-19T10:00:00.000-07:00

Week 7 Matchups:
Fister? I hardly know her. @ Angry Asians
Hail to the Chefs @ My Team Blows Again
I Stiff Armed Your Mom @ Party Animals
Lynnhood Curbstompers @ Show Me Your TD's
LFP Phreaks @ Breaston My Face

Monday, October 19th:
Monday Night Football - Denver Broncos @ San Diego Chargers, 5:30pm PT

Tuesday, October 20th:
Free Agency Opens on Forum - 12:00pm PT

Wednesday, October 21st:
Blog - Week 7 Breakdown by Kyle

Thursday, October 22nd:
Blog - Football Movie Marathon by Jared

Friday, October 23rd:
Blog - Team Owner Profile: Jason Wong by Mike

Saturday, October 24th:
Free Agency Closes on Forum - 5:00pm PT
Blog - Some semblance of order... by Mike

Sunday, October 25th:
Roster Submissions Due - 9:30am PT

Brady Finishes First Half with a Respectable 37.75 Points

2009-10-18T14:54:00.000-07:00

Holy Shit

Quarterbacks Gone Wild!

2009-10-18T14:19:00.000-07:00

The 5-point passing yardage bonus threshold was crossed by FIVE Quarterbacks this morning:
Drew Brees
Ben Roethlisberger
Joe Flacco
Aaron Rodgers
Matt Schaub

Tom Brady and Kurt Warner seem to be on their way as well. I'm sure as fuck rooting against Warner right now.

Hey Jared

2009-10-18T10:00:00.000-07:00

Fuck you

Week 6... Locked, cocked, and ready to rock!

2009-10-18T09:47:00.000-07:00

Here we go again! Week 6 is here and the scoreboard is updated! Lots of Utility usage this week, should make for some close games and maybe even some high scoring affairs. Bad luck to all of you!

Some semblance of order...

2009-10-17T10:00:00.000-07:00

Hear me out, because you have to. The latest debate here at LFP FFB headquarters has to do with the often unused trading process which has to pass through the anonymous "Trading Committee" that nobody has ever seen. A small group of interested parties feel that the trading committee leaves too much up to people that have no involvement in the league and has no place in making decisions that are important to all of the owners. Instead these dissenting minds think there should be a trading regulations charter drafted that will spell out exactly what makes up a passable trade, leaving the decision solely in the hands of the owners involved based on predetermined factors. Not only are competing team owners not involved in deciding their competition this way, but there are no third parties that would have a say in the way our league is made up and ultimately decided. The trading committee currently has the power to tell us as team owners that we're being unfair in our trading, even though they don't have to compete in our league and don't know how each of us as owners value our different players at different positions. To give these strangers that kind of power is irresponsible and cannot continue if we're to take the trading process in this league seriously. What have we had, like three or four trades in the history of the league?! Maybe if we didn't have this mysterious trading committee people would be more willing to actually try and make this league exciting on days other than Sunday and Monday! So I guess in the spirit of fair-play I would like to have some input on this via blog response, so let's hear it.

Team Owner Profile: Tony Le

2009-10-16T12:05:00.000-07:00

It seems only appropriate that after highlighting an original owner in LFP FFB we focus in on one of our newest owners, and specifically one who has enormous shoes to fill. We all remember the incredible story of Jesse "Juice" Martin's wild card playoff run last year, taking the Super Bowl down to the last offensive play run where a Pittsburgh sack and fumble recovery would etch "Hochuli's Gun Show" on to the league trophy forever by a mere 1.75 points, the closest margin of victory imaginable. Now Tony Le's "Hail to the Chefs" looks to assume control of the franchise that won the third season of LFP FFB's existence.

Tony kicked his Juice-like season off by phoning in his draft via Skype, exactly the way Jesse would have done it were he still in the league. Next, Tony went ahead and drafted the key pieces of Hockuli's Gun Show that won the title last post-season in Larry Fitzgerald and the Pittsburgh defense, bold moves but proven ones to try and set the franchise up for continued success. After five weeks in the league the Hail to the Chefs owner sits with a 3-2 record, 2-1 in his division, and holds a one game lead on the East Division wild card in second place. We were lucky enough to find Tony wandering the LFP FFB headquarters, apparently lost, looking for the taco bar, and stopped him to get his impressions heading in to week 6.

LFP FFB: Hello Tony, great to have you at the LFP HQ.
Tony Le: Who know how to stir up the taco beef?!
LFP: Excuse me?
TL: Let do the next week Taco Tuesday lunch on the 20th. I bring shredded chess and lecture!
LFP: That sounds wonderful Tony, I'm sure we will all mark that on our calendars. But let's move on... What kind of pressures are on you in your first season in the league? Not only are you taking over the franchise of last year's championship team, but you also now become only the second Asian team owner in league history... and start an interview like that...
TL: Well taking over Juice's team isn't a big deal, because I'm better than him at pretty much everything. Being Asian though I really get to see what a racist asshole you really are.
LFP: Clearly something's lost in translation there, it sounded like you said I'm a racist asshole.
TL: You are.
LFP: I'm sorry, can you speak English?
TL: I'm going to Bruce Lee, one-inch punch through your chest if you don't shut up.
LFP: Right... You're off to a very strong start in the league, over .500 and in second place in your division behind Adrian Peterson's team. That's incredibly impressive for a first time player and a first year owner, what do you expect from your guys in the coming weeks?
TL: My team hasn't done well every week, but we're still doing well so I feel good about them. I think we'll continue to improve and start dominating everyone in the league, if only because Brett Favre is the greatest player in the history of football.
LFP: On that note, will you ever start the aforementioned "greatest player in the league," or is he destined to miss every fantasy start while never missing a professional start?
TL: He will start! I'm just waiting for the right time.
LFP: That's very martial-artsy of you. Speaking of which, what was it like to lose the first every "Ninja Bowl" to Jason Wong? That's what we've called it around the league office, the "Ninja Bowl," clever huh?
TL: I hate you.
LFP: I'm sorry, I didn't mean to insult your honor.
TL: ...
LFP: Thanks for coming in.

Mr. Le is clearly a proud team owner and confident in his team, if not his ninja star throwing ability. This week he squares off with J.J. Didier and the Lynnhood Curbstompers, an original league owner, but Tony promises to sneak up from the shadows and kill them with precision and no mercy. Just kidding, but seriously.

See you all next week, over and out from LFP HQ.

-Commish

Football Movie Marathon #5: Knute Rockne All American (1940)

2009-10-15T12:01:00.000-07:00

Of the major American team sports baseball probably consistently produces the most quality movies. Until the 80s brought us The Natural, Eight Men Out, Major Leauge, Field of Dreams and Bull Durham, the gold standard for baseball movies was probably The Pride of the Yankees (1942). I bring this up because this week's marathon movie is perhaps the football equivalent of the classic Lou Gerhig biopic. Whatever you thought about one of them, you'll probably think about the other. Both feature a complete lovefest for what are now completely insufferable teams, both paint about as flattering potrayal of their subjects as possible, and both offer one of the best "big speech" moments in sports movie history.

Knute Rockne All American basically is a telling of the legendary sports figure's life and career as the Notre Dame football coach. Rockne is credited with popularizing and innovating several tactics. As a player in his younger days, he was the recipent of several forward passes in the Notre Dame offense that utilized the play better than anyone. As a coach, he is often credited as the first to put "men in motion" prior to the snap (he did it with his whole backfield until rules limited teams to only have one man allowed to move before the snap).

Perhaps the primary draw to the film now is the supporting role of George Gipp, played by none other than future President Ronald Reagan. Gipp is considered one of the better college football players of all time (ranked the 22nd best ever college player on ESPN's list a couple years ago, by people who are undoubtably experts that have watched a ton of 90 year old football games). If you were ever curious where the "Win one for the Gipper" quote came from, well, here it is.

Overall, this is a decent football movie and a fun watch, although it feels incredibly dated, even by the standard of 1940s movies. Seemingly today, a biopic can't be made unless the subject was once drug using womanizer (Ray, Walk the Line) or somewhat mentally unstable (The Aviator, A Beautiful Mind). Put simply, you might see a Roger Clemens movie someday, but probably not a Greg Maddux one. Knute Rockne is potrayed about as good of a guy as you'll ever find for 100 minutes, and that's the movie. I didn't find it all that off putting, but can certainley see why many would.

Note: You probably should not watch this anytime soon if you're a UW fan bitter about the recent game against Notre Dame. This movie loves the school more than Rudy does.

Football Movie Marathon Rankings
1. Brian's Song
2. Knute Rockne All American
2. Varsity Blues
3. Invincible
4. Two For the Money

Week 6: A Look Ahead

2009-10-12T12:00:00.000-07:00

Week 6 Matchups:
Angry Asians @ LFP Phreaks
Party Animals @ Show Me Your TD's
Lynnhood Curbstompers @ Hail to the Chefs
I Stiff Armed Your Mom @ My Team Blows Again
Breaston My Face @ Fister? I hardly know her.

Monday, October 12th:
Monday Night Football - NY Jets @ Miami Dolphins, 5:30pm PT

Tuesday, October 13th:
Free Agency Opens on Forum - 12:00pm PT
Blog - Free Agency Review by Craig

Wednesday, October 14th:
Blog - Week 6 Matchups by Kyle

Thursday, October 15th:
Blog - Football Movie Marathon by Jared

Friday, October 16th:
Blog - Team Owner Profile by Mike

Saturday, October 17th:
Free Agency Closes on Forum - 5:00pm PT
Blog - Some semblance of order... by Mike

Sunday, October 18th:
Roster Submissions Due - 9:30am PT

I think I can, I think I can, I think I can!

2009-10-12T01:03:00.000-07:00

The topic of our Week 5 player profile, and previously winless team owner Craig Peterson is playing the little blue steam engine from our childhoods this week, all set up to take out the defending East Division champion Angry Asians just one week after one of the greatest Monday night comebacks in league history. With a $20 effort from Rashard Mendenhall, and a huge Utility usage of Donovan McNabb, the little Stiffies that could stopped thinking it and just did it like a Nike commercial. This result will leave some questions for both Peterson and the angriest Asian in the league, Jason Wong. CP goes to 1-4 but has his first big W under his belt and can start gaining momentum. Meanwhile the Asians land at 2-3, with a split in division games at 2-2. In an East Division that has a logjam at the bottom of the standings, J-Jak's squad of supposed non-cross-dressers is trying to lock in a win against the other J.J.'s Lynnhood Curbstompers. Should Jakubiak's Blowfest finish off Didier's Hoodrats, everyone in the East will be looking up and trying to answer some questions. There should be a couple of interesting finishes, so be sure to tune in to Monday Night Football as Week 5 comes to a close!

Week 5 is on!

2009-10-11T10:04:00.000-07:00

Week 5 hits right now, games are just starting and the website was updated around 9:40 with all updated rosters and match-ups!

Some semblance of order...

2009-10-09T23:54:00.000-07:00

Hear me out, because you have to. The latest debate here at LFP FFB headquarters has to do with the excessive use of free agency "contingency" bidding. It is the consensus by a small group that contingency bidding somewhat waters down the entire process of auction bidding, and that it is no longer necessary with the revisions that have been made. Since there is a five minute window after the last bid, and the free agency deadline has been voted on and moved to 5:00pm on Saturdays, I see no reason that people can't just focus in on their primary bids, and guess what, if you lose your auction, tough luck, that's how auctions go. The forum looks ridiculous with people bidding on 42 kickers and 18 defenses just to be sure they don't have to actually pay attention to anything, and I think this needs to be addressed as soon as possible. So I guess in the spirit of fair-play I would like to have some input on this via blog response, so let's hear it and we might get to a vote in the coming week.

Team Owner Profile: Craig Peterson

2009-10-09T10:00:00.000-07:00

In LFPFFB history there has been no more enigmatic an owner than the one we will profile heading in to Week 5 of the 2009 season. Craig Peterson tasted greatness in the league's inaugural season by boasting a 16-1 regular season record in the first campaign for any team owner, a mark that has yet to be challenged or even come close to by another team. However, after such an incredible run of regular season dominance the likes of which we may never see again, his Stiffies finished dead last in the playoffs and it seems that to this point the franchise has never recovered from such a let down. Following up that 2006 campaign Craig's squads have gone 8-9 and 6-11 in 2007 and 2008 respectively. With an 0-4 start after another heartbreaking loss no other team has seen such a reversal of fortune in the league's history, and it seems only fitting to kick things off with one of the original four owners that remain in the league.

Craig stands not only as an original member of LFPFFB, but he remains the only team owner to maintain the same team name year after year in a nod to true tradition. We were lucky enough to catch Mr. Peterson just after a heated team meeting with his squad and he agreed to sit down with us at the league office for a chat.

Craig Peterson: So do I get some extra free agency money for doing this? Because Glen Coffee's going to haunt me for the rest of my life.
LFPFFB: Unfortunately that's not going to happen, but we will validate your parking.
CP: I walked here.
LFP: And we appreciate you coming in to talk with us.
CP: Fuck you.
LFP: Thank you for the warm greeting. Obviously this has been a rough first quarter of the season for you, starting 0-4 and losing an absolute heartbreaker in your division basically because Green Bay went for a two point conversion instead of taking an extra point on Monday Night Football... Point nine points, wow that's gotta sting. What, if any adjustments are you looking to make heading into week five, knowing that it's now or never if you want to turn things around?
CP: Well, if everyone I play against would stop having the game of their fucking life I won't have to make any adjustments.
LFP: Can you target any one thing that may have cost you the games here in the early going?
CP: Yeah, I can actually target four things. Adrian Peterson, Matt Schaub, the New York Giants defense and fucking Steve Smith on the Giants... He's not even Steve Smith on the Panthers who is fucking good, he's on the Giants and he's not Plaxico Burress, who I really blame because if he didn't shoot himself in the leg I would have fucking won my game.
LFP: I'm sensing some animosity, how frustrating has this season been so far?
CP: I'd say very... Yeah, very is pretty accurate.
LFP: What's it like sleeping with a division rival?
CP: What?
LFP: You and Jakubiak living together, which of you is Reggie Bush and which is Kim? I mean she has a great back-end if you know what I'm saying, so I'm tempted to say Jason, but you never know what it's like behind closed doors.
CP: Ummm, I'm uncomfortable with this, I don't sleep with Jason, we just live in the same house.
LFP: Yeah, but is he a good kisser?
CP: This interview's over.

Clear frustration both in the league and in the bedroom for Craig Peterson and I Stiff Armed Your Mom, and things look as difficult as ever looking ahead to his week five matchup with the reigning division champion Angry Asians and Jason Wong.

We'll be back next Wednesday with another team owner profile, and until then bad luck to you all and enjoy the blog content all week!

-Commish

Football Movie Marathon #4: Invincible (2006)

2009-10-08T12:00:00.000-07:00

The fourth movie of the marathon is Invincible, a Disney movie starring Mark Wahlberg as a 30 year old walk on special teams player in the NFL during the 70s

Invincible is the football equivalent of a nice punt. Nothing too thrilling about it, and its nice and safe. The film strictly adheres to sports movie formula and doesn't really strive for a whole lot more. Wahlberg is a substitute teacher who is laid off and goes to work as a bartender to make ends meet. When Eagles coach Dick Vermeil (played by Greg Kinnear) holds open tryouts, he is encouraged to join by his friends. Papale's speed and work ethic gets him onto the team, and much like Rudy or Rocky, he gets a chance to live his dream.

The way some of the characters are written is pretty odd to me. Wahlberg plays Papale in a dark and brooding fashion. You get the feeling that all the punches life has thrown at him may be the reason, and this is fine. But where is the JOY when he steps onto the field? This guy has overcome the odds and you just never really get the feeling that he is all that excited to be there. Before the final credits, they show some real life footage and Papale looks happy as a clam. Interesting that Wahlberg chose to play the character the way he did. The other character that just seems out of place is Janet Cantrell (played by Elisabeth Banks). This character is supposed to be interesting because she's the love interest and because she's the girl who knows about sports. The movie needs roughly a half dozen scenes to show that she is "one of the guys". Gets annoying and repetitive fast. Lastly, the movie really seems to strive to bring Philly to life and make it a "character" in the film, the way a Woody Allen or Spike Lee film/joint would with New York. Doesn't do it so well. For some reason, the sky is bronze (like in the picture above) for like 1/3rd of the film too. Weird.

As is the formula in all the Disney sports movies, everything is heightened toward the main character(s), as if the story isn't good enough to breathe the way it happened in real life. The world has to fucking revolve around Mark Wahlberg. Dick Vermeil is sitting in his house with his wife just hoping making this guy the last player on his roster won't bite him in the ass. You'd think if your team sucks so bad, you'd be more worried about, you know, every other player on the team. In his first game, Papale misses a tackle on the opening kickoff. Of course, this leads to Dick Vermeil grabbing his facemask on the sideline and angrily reminding him "I STUCK MY NECK OUT FOR YOU!!!". Then, the top story on the sports news is essentially "Local boy Vincent Papale SUCKS!". Now I watch a lot of football, and roughly 90% of the time the kick returner, who is one of the best athletes on his team, makes the first would-be tackler miss. Hardly the end of the world. I hate when I movie feels like it has to spell it out for you. THIS CHARACTER IS HAVING A HARD TIME GETTING ACCLIMATED TO THE NFL. Thanks. It's annoying as shit.

Despite the off-putting dumbing down of just about anything football, the movie remains entertaining enough all the way through. Not something I'd watch again, but worth the rental.

Football Movie Marathon Rankings
1. Brian's Song
2. Varsity Blues
3. Invincible
4. Two For the Money

Week 5 Matchups

2009-10-07T14:00:00.000-07:00

Coming off an exciting week 4, week 5 looks to bring some normalcy back. A few early contenders will be exposed and the glut of teams at .500 in the West look to separate from the pack.

Hail to the Chefs (3-1) vs Breaston my Face (4-0)
Two first place teams clash, but they've gotten to their division leads in decidedly different ways. Jared has been the most dominating team in the league winning by an average of more thna 30 points per week. Tony is 9th(!) in the league in points, but far and away number one in points allowed (less than 75 per week...nice defense)
Jared will have some issues with Rivers on a bye and McFadden hurt,but Tony is without Ryan Grant and Greg Olsen. His RBs for this week (Buckhalter and Donald Brown) leave a lot to be desired

Jared 98 - Tony 83

Fister? I hardly know her. (2-2) vs Party Animals (1-3)
Vick burst onto the scene with a huge week 1 led by Drew Brees, but alas Jared was right...Brees doesn't play Detroit every week (hard to count on 360 yards and 6 TDs) and this week he doesn't play at all. She does however have a few Steelers who have the Lions this week. Kyle is forced to stick with a struggling Tony Romo because Cutler is on a bye and Marques Colston also sits. Romo has a favorable matchup to get back on track as does Slaton and the NYG defense

Kyle 95 - Vikki 87

Lynnhood Curbstompers (2-2) vs My team Blows Again (3-1)
JJ has his full roster at his disposal, but Jason only sits Vincent Jackson and has choice matchups for his running backs. AD vs the Rams = bad news for fantasy opponents. JJ could keep it close, but he has too much to overcome

JJ 94 - Jason 110

Angry Asians (2-2) vs I Stiff Armed your Mom (0-4)
Wong coming off a stunning comeback has to sit QB Rodgers, but his backup is playing the Lions so he should be OK. at the same time Craig has to sit Matt Forte, Greg Jennings, Mason Crosby and his defense. Wong has enough left to keep Craigs 0fer going

Jason 90 - Craig 83

Matchup of the Week
LFP Phreaks (2-2) vs Show me your TD's (1-3)
This should be the closest matchup of the week. Mike has been the better team thus far, but he is hurt by byes this week. Pierre Thomas, Antonio Gates, Donald Driver and the San Diego D all have to sit, while Nick/Gas have a full roster. Most weeks Mike would have the advantage, but this week Nick has a shot to steal a win

Mike 89 - Nick 90

Angry Asians do it!

2009-10-05T21:05:00.000-07:00

In one of the best Monday nights in league history we saw a comeback by Jared, an 0.9 point decision go to Tony Le, and of course a massive comeback walloping by Wong's Asian squad over Jakubiak's blowfactory! What a Monday! Week 5 here we come. Oh by the way... Watch that ticker, it's got hand-updated scores that you can't get anywhere else!!!